i bought my feelings for you at a convenience store

i bought my feelings for you at a convenience store
where they used to sell all kinds of cheap stuff
i just didn’t know that what i bought years ago
would now be some kind of collector’s item
whose price is much higher than i paid before
and that i would be forced to sell it
to the highest bidder. i sold my feelings for you
to the gentlemen wearing the funny hat
who somehow looks like a worsened version of me
but at least (i imagine) can lift up to
three times more weight than my arms can
what would certainly be helpful if one day
you decide to move from your cozy apartment
to a three bedroom house with a small pool
where you two would raise the children i helped name.
now that the transaction is finished i start to think that
i shouldn't have bought my feelings for you, in the first place
but unfortunately, that store will never accept regret
as a reason to give me my money back.