The Wholeness of Being

From the moment we opened our eyes
 and thought, “I am awake”
 we searched for wholeness. 
 It must be in another, in a god, in a word
 or a heart or a place, for this, this
 poor, uncertain dithering thing that is I
 surely must be lacking something?
 Surely in this act of waking we have lost,
 we have fallen, we have forgotten
 and every step must lead the search for it?

And yet –

It is said we
 must not want, 
 for want is the sin
 of the flesh and we must
 ascend, transcend, condescending
 these houses of blood and bone
 we inhabit, and then
 in lightness and perfection we shall be
 free.

Is there freedom in unbalance? For we are
 whole people, we are full in our lack, 
 we are complete in our wanting. 
 The sin of knowledge was not in the
 awareness of good and evil but
 in their separation, for we are not one or the other
 but both, and both is not both but one
 one is not this or that but all. It is said we must not want, but
 want we must, for

What about now is lacking in being, in
 all its hunger and drive? 
 How can this existence of everything
 not be the wholeness of us, strange
 thinking beings who make ourselves empty, 
 in the search of

becoming?