Why I Missed Open House

Conlee Elementary’s open house, Sept. 12, 2006… I was supposed to be there. Something happened…

Parents, students, teachers all
gather in the Conlee Halls.
It’s open house, a time to share,
a time for fun, but, where oh where
is Mr. Field?

Snoring, snoring, on a couch he lay.
Snoring, snoring, oblivious to the day.

Ring! RING!! RING!!! The telephone.
He snaps awake with startled moan.
It’s Mrs. James — open house is through.
It’s 7:40. So where were you?

Snoring, snoring, on his couch he lay.
Snoring, snoring, the waning of the day.

I write these lines on Wednesday morn.
Self-loathing greets regret and scorn.
To make amends for my disgrace
There’s but one answer — I’ll shave my face!

Snoring, snoring, on his back he lay.
Snoring, ignoring, the darkening of the day.

My tale is over, now please make note.
In order not to miss your boat,
eat something light, then walk a block.
And always, ALWAYS, set your clock.

Snoring, snoring, on a couch he lay.
Snoring, boring, he missed another day.