writing your story can be helpful, my therapist says . . .

“krisis” by Stefano Pollio on Unsplash
used under Unsplash License

a creative challenge,
a therapeutic challenge,
this narrative
this journeyʻs account
though i try,
iʻm not ready.
iʻm not ready to tell this story.
iʻm not ready to remember this story.

i keep thinking,
iʻm getting stronger,
iʻm understanding better,
iʻm accepting easier.

then something like this happens,
stopping me dead in my tracks:
the demons scream,
driving myself dangerously close to cliffʻs edge.

they hide, the scars:
deep, in my soul
beneath the sudden scabs,
wounds not ready to be exposed,
not ready to yield
the blood of
terror, fear, shame.
maybe theyʻll never be ready.

maybe Iʻll never be ready.