Let’s Shelve That Idea, for Now

Not everyone needs a presidential library

Since we know books won’t be a part of the library dedicated to the presidential pursuits of the Former Occupant of the Oval Office, here are a few content suggestions: A tube of Rudy Colludy’s hair dye; a series of misguided tweets; a roll of paper towels from the Hurricane Maria Good Will Tour; the tiny desk where the Orange Oaf parked his prodigious posterior; the glowing orb from Mango Mussolini’s Saudi Road Show; the hurricane map featured in SharpieGate; the Diet Coke button installed on the Resolute Desk; a collection of red parody MAGA caps; a selection of hysterical Comrade Minus Memes. Photo collage: Author’s archives

A lot has been made of late about the Former Occupant of the Oval Office’s pursuit of a so-called “Presidential” library. Reports in the press indicate Mango Mussolini has been thinking about his legacy and has even put his former caddy and Twitter tweaker Dan Scavino in charge of scouting out the situation.

Since we know Comrade Minus is just this shy of illiterate, we can pretty much be certain no books — except perhaps the ones he had others write for him — will be involved in this project. So I’ve taken this opportunity (“Yuck List”, Bigly) to suggest items to fill this theme park — er, post-modern tribute — to tRumpyism.

A plaster cast of tire tracks permanently sunken in the greens of his golf courses

It is a known fact (“Yuck List”) that this despicable dude drives on the greens at his golf courses. Why not take at least one plaster likeness of the damage for posterity?

A curated list of the Twitter Turd’s oddest tweets

Start with “covfefe”. Move on from there, perhaps to his “deepest apologizes” and something about the country of “Columbia.” It would be the greatest list in “hustory”, from the guy…