The Obituary of Senator Mitch McConnell, (R-KY)
The country’s media will be all over this story, so let me get my say in now
Don’t get me wrong, I am not wishing death on McConnell. As vile as he is, most humans — most — have the right to wring as much as they can out of life without others wishing an early demise onto them.
So, Moscow Mitch, live as long as you can, but I would prefer if you passed the remainder of your life sitting on some random front porch in the state you so maimed, fiddling around with origami or some grand quilting project. With that out of the way, let’s put together his sort-of obituary.
Mitch McConnell headed off to his final resting place this past winter after suffering from complications from a virus known as “Trumpatitus.” Trumpatitus takes hold when Republican politicians sell out too many of their patriotic convictions to accumulate as many short-term political wins as possible.
The afflicted politicians were usually the ones who most comfortably rode on the coattails of the former president. The discomfort they may have experienced was never too much if it meant reaching political goals that otherwise would have been denied them had Hillary Clinton been elected president.
