I Was in an Abusive Polyamorous Relationship for 7 Years
What I learned about how abuse happens in non-monogamy.
It took me three years and a ton of therapy to be able to write what you’re about to read. I’m doing it mostly for the ones who might need it, whether because you’re considering polyamory or some other form of ethical non-monogamy, or because you’re already practicing it, or because you’ve just got out of a bad relationship of any kind and you’re still trying to figure out what happened, or maybe you just want to be in a romantic relationship. Even if you’re monogamous, you should keep reading, because this is about romantic relationships and emotional and psychological abuse.
I dated a narcissist for seven years.
Our relationship was polyamorous from the start. I lived with my boyfriend and my boyfriend’s girlfriend and the three of us became family. Each of us was free to see anyone we wished to. This was the theory. Five years into this relationship, I fell in love with a woman and we started dating. I was dating a man and a woman, and living with part of my poly-cule. People came and went, our family went through several changes along the years. We all became known in the community for speaking about our relationship orientation and being activists for the poly community.
