How do you know?
I’m often concerned if I am doing the “right thing.” I don’t want to make a “mistake” and find myself regretting a decision. Because of this fear, it takes a ridiculous amount of time and anxiety for me to make decisions; some of the choices being extremely trivial. I’m also a people-pleaser, which creates more anxiety when others are involved. The choice I want to make is what the Lord would have me do, and what would make friends/family happy; I try really hard to follow promptings from the Holy Ghost, but often times I don’t feel strongly one way or the other. What to do then? And if you do feel strongly, how do you know if it is the Spirit or your own desires? If they are both good choices, is there really a wrong decision?
My husband does his best to help me realize that most times it doesn’t matter, if they are both good and it wouldn’t hurt one way or the other (if you don’t feel guided one way or the other). I’m also reminded that “it is not meet that I should [be commanded] in all things; for he that is compelled in all things, the same is a slothful and not a wise servant….[Instead I] should be anxiously engaged in a good cause, and do many things of [my] own free will….For the power is in [me (and you)], wherein [we] are agents unto [ourselves]” (Doctrine and Covenants 58:26–28). In other words, just make a choice, doing your best to “choose the right” (hymn number 239). If is turns out to be a wrong choice, well bummer. But that is what the Atonement is all about, so repent and then continue to do your best. Use the agency God has so graciously given us; the agency that we fought for in the pre-existence. It still isn’t easy for me, but I’ve really been working on making decisions, trying to choose good, without Spiritual prompting, and trust that if my choice wasn’t the best the Spirit will help to correct me.
But what if I do feel strongly one way or the other, how do I know it is the Spirit and not me or Satan? One way to know is ask “does it invite me to do good?” (Moroni 7:16). If yes, then do it! If no, then don’t do it. Because the Spirit invites to do good. Or ask “does it uplift and edify?” (D&C 50:23–24). “To edify means to build up spiritually or to bring one closer to the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost” (https://www.lds.org/manual/teaching-the-gospel-a-ces-resource-for-teaching-improvement/2-edifying-teaching?lang=eng).
Knowing whether or not a decision is the correct choice can be difficult for me at times, but I am working on it. Doing these things, and asking these questions helps.
How do you make decisions?
