Pop Culture Mondays/10.12.20

The “I AM BACK” Edition

Brooke Hammerling
Pop Culture Mondays
10 min readOct 12, 2020

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Welcome to my brain…

Happy Monday my darling pop culture junkies!! Well, I am not going to lie…I am more surprised than any of you that I am sitting here today writing this. I REALLY thought I was going to be off for a few weeks post open-heart surgery but MODERN MEDICINE is really kind of amazing. A week ago I was in the hospital looking like part CYBORG, I am not going to lie, attached to tubes and IVs and everything in between. I could not walk let alone sit up in bed without help. And today? I am home and sitting at my desk writing PCM and it is sort of mind blowing. I will say if I was going to take a week off from writing a newsletter that does it’s best to avoid Trump, I picked the BEST ONE. I was literally in the ICU, surrounded by nurses and doctors…a breathing tube down my throat which — let me be clear — is the WORST. I am coming to very quickly and the nurses are saying my name and I am trying to tell them by shaking my leg like crazy to take the fucking tubes out of my throat. I am getting really agitated. Like really. Then one nurse says “Trump has Covid and is in the hospital” and this was like the most calming words anyone could have ever said and I love that person whoever she was. I soon got the tube out and the first thing I asked is “Is he still president?”

Well, alas we know how that turned out. But what a week.

So, there is a hodge podge of ground to cover from the time I was offline to now…we are STILL as Trump-free as possible. As I sit here, surrounded by my Haribo Gummy Bears (thanks Rovins!) and all the beautiful flowers everyone sent and the baked goods that I am pretending have NO calories, I invite you to take a break and watch some fun viral videos and breathe for a minute!

And a special thanks to my sister, Stacey Bender, who dropped everything and came from the East Coast to help me on my road to recovery. Without her, I would not be sitting here writing this as I would have needed a lot more time to recover!

Time Machine

2020 DOES HAVE GOOD THINGS:

The look that crossed my surgeons face prior to me being wheeled into an 8 hour open heart surgery when I asked if I could bring my phone with me so I had it when I woke up was kind of funny. Also, kind of not, but I digress….I am SURE I am not the only one who has asked this right? WELL, as soon as I did get my phone which thankfully for my sister was in my hands as soon as that tube was out of my throat, I was sort of concerned I was maybe hallucinating when I saw that Fleetwood Mac was all over my socials and top of the music charts.

“Oh god please let Stevie Nicks be ok I cannot handle this…” was my first thought.

But after a tiny bit of digging I realized a video I saw on TikTok before my surgery had gone beyond viral. I had it in my LAST newsletter but since then it had gone SUPER star viral and for all the right reasons. First let’s show you what I am taking about in case you missed it and if you did miss it THEN you didn’t read my last newsletter so SHAME ON YOU ❤️ :

It’s intoxicating to watch but I also think it’s so soothing and chill and the medicine we needed for the shitshow that 2020 has been. Like, you just feel like we are all going to be ok after watching this. It’s all going to work out.

But the responses to the video have been amazing…including from Mick Fleetwood HIMSELF and we cannot get enough of it:

“Dreams” has become a number one hit AGAIN in 2020 thanks to our beloved Spy Channel TikTok. And I have to say it was incredibly entertaining to watch all these videos in my hospital bed using pillows and anything I could to prop up my phone to watch them as I couldn’t hold my phone then. But the dancing dance-off cowboys IS everything:

And Ocean Spray did not ignore this and instead celebrated Nathan Opodaca, the man responsible for bringing smiles to millions when we all find it hard to smile, with a truck filled with Ocean Spray.

The thing is, Nathan had a truck that had 320K miles on it and on his way to work in Idaho, it broke down. And he decided he couldn’t sit around waiting for help, so he grabbed his skateboard and his juice and filmed his ride to work…LEGEND. And here we are. It is really the story we all needed.

Le Sigh

JE SUIS CONFUS:

OK so here is a little insight into me. I took I think maybe 10 years of French. I was shipped off to live with a family in Paris when I was 14 specifically to learn French. I actually was held by the POLICE at JFK Airport upon my return in August of 1988 as I had a cooler of cheese that my mother insisted I bring back to her. Cheese that apparently was ILLEGAL to bring back to the US and my mother KNEW this but didn’t think Customs would stop an adorable 14 year old girl in Naf Naf overalls and polka dot socks but ALAS they did and it was a SCENE that I am sure people are still talking about to this day. Mom would say to this day it was worth the risk.

But I digress.

The point is, I spent a lot of time learning French and here is what it got me.

I can conjugate the FUCK out of a verb.

Je Suis

Tu Es

Il/Elle Est

Nous Sommes

Vous Êtes

Ils/Elle Sont

That and “fermé la bouche” is basically ALL I got.

This is important because Netflix’s new show, “Emily in Paris”, created by the LEGEND Darren Star who is essentially responsible for every trend I have ever followed in my entire life. He created “Beverly Hills 90210” obviously. “Melrose Place”. “Sex and the City”. And “Younger”.

I mean, I am pretty sure there is nothing original about me. I am an entire mix of: Brenda, a little Andrea Zuckerman for sure, maybe SOME Kelly…maybe all of Melrose Place peeps at one point in time and 100 percent a mix between Carrie and Samantha Jones and the entire premise of “Younger” is my life as I am 46 living like I am 26. SO OF COURSE I was going to binge watch “Emily in Paris”. But before I could start episode one, my socials were going NUTS. I mean people could not stop talking about it but not for the best reasons.

“Mind-numbing”

“Ridiculous”

“Insulting”

“Unwatchable”

BUT then…the people I trust the most started weighing in with things like, “I hated it so much I couldn’t stop watching it.” Or “It was so bad I watched every second of it because I loved hating it.”

The premise is a young woman with a flare for dressing up and who DOES NOT speak French, moves from Chicago to Paris for a job at a “Marketing Firm” which to me every time she says this made me think of the viral TikTok trend we talked about a few weeks ago where people say “I am accountant” to cover up their other job.

SO, I watched it. And it was mindless. And silly. And the idea of stupid selfies of Emily wearing a beret with a stupid hashtag would warrant her going viral is absurd or that she was brought to France to help them with Social Media when she herself started with only 200 followers on Instagram before going “viral” in Paris. Also, IN MY OPINION it missed the mark by using Insta and not TikTok as the platform. But people were not having it that a company would send someone to Paris who didn’t speak French (which is absurd as I have many friends living in places like Hong Kong and Paris and Amsterdam who do not speak the language so I don’t buy into it.)

But man people LOST THEIR MINDS. And I can’t think of anything BETTER for Netflix. Taylor Lorenz put it perfectly here:

VOILÁ! The show is a masterpiece. It may kill brain cells, but worth it because it is so fun and silly and absurd and offensive and everything in between. And remember, when Carrie ran off to Paris with Aleksandr Petrovsky and had no friends, and didn’t speak French and was left alone in her ballgown in a hotel room or when he abandoned her and then “Slapped her”…we wept for her.

Thank you sir

THIS IS NOT ABOUT PENCE. THIS IS ABOUT THE FLY:

Look, I am trying to do this whole avoiding politics as much as possible but REALLY, the FLY is an American hero. So picture this…I am home from the hospital a mere few hours…perched in my hospital bed set up on the ground floor in my TV room as climbing stairs was NOT an option for me last week. I am slightly out of it from the meds. I have a nurse there. My sister Stacey. My dog Potato. And we tuck in to watch the VP debate. I mean I am living for the facial expressions of Kamala. It was giving me joy. And then I see the fly. But I think the fly is on the TV. I ask everyone to get rid of the fly from the TV laughing that it has landed in the perfect spot on the TV.

But NOPE. We realize this fly IS in fact sitting on the head of the Vice President and it is NOT going anywhere. But come on…have you had a fly ever land on you? You swat it away. This GUY is like part animatron/part droid/part Beelzebub and he didn’t move. The fly finally left after TWO FULL MINUTES after being so bored himself he was like NOPE, I am out. But remember…flies are drawn to shit my friends.

It brought me great joy and for that, I dedicate this week and my recovery to the FLY. And all the content it gave us.

This is a long clip and frankly the fly is the least funny part of it (KAMALA KAMALA KAMALA) but god I still love all of it:

And maybe my fave remix EVER:

Some of the best memes from this HISTORIC moment are here:

And lastly, I leave you with this because JUST for a second life made more sense this week:

AND THESE ARE A FEW OF MY FAVORITE THINGS….

OK so the pain meds are kicking in and I am going to crawl back in bed and finish watching Octopus Teacher because OMG but let me leave you with a few of my fave things I was able to retain in my fog…

  • You WILL NEVER eat octopus again my friends. Never ever.
  • The Duet Feature of TikTok is the most incredible tech innovation in 10 years and if you disagree don’t AT me. But this is why I LOVE TIKTOK. A TikTokker made a musical parody and invited people to duet him and it has become genius. YOU WILL GET CHILLS. Watch the whole thing:
  • And thank you to this woman who has given me so much joy this past week even though it really hurts to laugh:
  • And lastly I was confused why Lex Luther was trending on Twitter the other day but then it became obvious. Oh Jeff…call me, let’s talk optics k boo?

Until next week, my Pop Culture Junkies…I will say I am pretty proud of myself that despite needing a machine to pump my heart for 8 hours 10 days ago, I am back bringing you a teeny look inside my precarious brain. But I also have to say HOLY FUCK UCLA HOSPITAL is insane and incredible and I mean I have nothing else to say but they are miracle workers and I am so grateful to everyone there.

Have a beautiful week you guys. Keep working those phone banks, canvassing those neighborhoods, getting out the message to VOTE. And see you next week.

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