Pop Culture Mondays/7.26.21

The “SPACE COWBOY” Edition

Welcome to my brain…

HAPPPPPPY Monday my pop culture junkies. Whether you’re reading this from your amazing villa in Greece, or overlooking the sea in the South of France while your hand is on JLO’s perfect ass (read below) or whilst roaming thru the hills of Tuscany where everyone seems to be or sitting at a desk in NYC or trying to write a book in Rehoboth (I see you Swisher)…we can all agree on one thing no matter where we are….that last week was a LOT. While Covid numbers are rising across the globe, and everyone is trying to stay safe and figure it all out, JEFFREY BEZOS, SPACE COWBOY (you cannot call him an astronaut a new ruling from the FAA now states) had a little 2 minute adventure to space-ISH. MORE ON THAT LATER. But we are so happy for Cowboy Jeff who has ALWAYS wanted to go to space:

…so he made his dreams come true (or according to him, we the Amazon customers of the world made this dream possible). Look, I have always always wanted to live on a tropical island so MAYBE my readers will help make this happen. Should I start charging a subscription fee? BECAUSE YOU GUYS….TROPICAL ISLAND.

OK I digress, especially when we have a lot of JEFFREY BEZOS memes to cover and there was actually some more crazy pop culture moments that have happened this past week. Buckle up….we are and always will be TRUMP-free and I say TRUMP-ADJACENT free but SOMETIMES we have to make exceptions for FOX News people, when it is too good to ignore. ANYWAY….enjoy this sugar-free escape.

XOXO…

🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆🍆

IS THAT A KINDLE IN YOUR POCKET OR ARE YOU JUST HAPPY TO SEE ME?

Please listen to the above while reading….

OH Jeffrey. Jeffrey Bezos. I am sorry but thank god for Bo Burnham giving us this magical soundtrack for the summer. SOUNDTRACKING THE PENIS launch would NOT have been the same without this song. Now, I assume you are all amazingly loyal PCM readers and therefore know the song for which I am referring as I have covered it before but then there are my friends like Britt who send me things that I have already covered and I shame them by responding like, “Yeah that was in last week’s PCM but whatever…” 😇 BUT, I admit, you guys have much busier lives than I do and way more important things to focus on so I will REMIND you of this genius song…

AND APOLOGIES as this is definitely NOT appropriate (for work, for school, for life) and apologies to Bill G who does not deserve this but IT IS art.

OK so with that….let’s take a look at the funniest, most viral moments from the penis rocket launch. Because that’s why are are all here!

(This one above is in reference to the fact Amazon employees in factories are discouraged from taking “breaks”)

PLEASE note that Mark Zuckerberg liked this Insta. SO MANY THOUGHTS.

ALSO…THIS. You know you all thought he looked a little different? MY guess is he was hoping to fix his lazy eye for his day in the spotlight so he had someone LOAD him up with botox and fillers to lift the eye but in the name of all things Kardashian…it’s a LOT.

ALSO just to be a little annoying here but he says he was excited to see what they will learn…WTF DO YOU LEARN in 2 minutes???

RIGHT here…right here you had publicists literally throw their phones down, run out of the building and screaming “I CANNOT” and all the color drained from in-house counsel’s faces and you had lawyers circling about how they can turn THIS statement into a class action lawsuit. I CANNOT BELIEVE he used his inside voice in public here.

AND LADIES AND GENTLEMEN….

The greatest movie made of all time thanks to Jon Stewart and Jason Alexander as a promo for the new Jon Stewart show…

There are so many more…so many more…

Is this really happening?

DID YOU KNOW THE OLYMPICS IS HAPPENING?

OK I kid. I am sure there are a lot of you tuning in and watching the excitement…BUT, it does feel very very strange. It feels strange to have the Olympics while in the midst of this pandemic and one where they have had to block spectators which let’s be clear REALLY is the point of the Olympics. WE MUST ENTERTAIN THE PEOPLE. And this is not really happening. And from all I have heard from people I know based in Tokyo….the locals are NOT pleased. Besides FOX News thinking Japan is actually China (CLICK HERE FOR THIS AMAZINGNESS)…there have been some other memeable moments…SO in case you have not been following, I got you.

LET US START WITH TONGA. And thank you Tonga from the bottom of my heart.

Then we have the amazing Naomi Osaka who lit the Olympic torch…and the socials reacted perfectly.

In case you missed that…well I am not linking to Megyn Kelly here because she sucks but she was MAD at Naomi for doing media with zero understanding of basically anything and just trying to be a troll to get attention. NATURALLY.

And then the anti sex cardboard beds have been fun:

And here we have a series of fun look at the whole situation:

And then my fave moment so far and also…HI I AM MOVING TO AUSTRALIA SO I CAN DATE A SMOKING HOT SWIM COACH….but the swim coach for Australia is EVERYTHING. Thank you Dean Boxall…

AND JUST A FEW OF MY FAVORITE THINGS (AND SOME DESPICABLE ONES TOO…)

OK, I am on a deadline today because I have places to go and people to see…so here please find a little round-up of some of the other things that happened…

  • WE ARE ALL MONTANA MAN. Look….this was unexpected from a mountain man in a bait shop I am not going to lie. AND I AM HERE FOR IT:
  • This new trend on TikTok which you may have seen your kids trying to do at some point:
  • ICE-T’s daughter IS adorable…but this pic is making the rounds of socials because she looks exactly like him.
  • OK parents….LOCK UP YOUR HONEY! Seriously…lock it away.
  • JLO and Ben Affleck are very much back together as we have discussed AT LENGTH. Yesterday, I am guessing after a few rosés on the boat, JLO was like BITCH we are posting these fabulous pics of me on my 52nd birthday because I LOOK AMAZE and holy hell she does.

And the GEN X WORLD COLLAPSED AS one pic is form the music video a lifetime ago with the 2 of them and then this weekend…

  • AND AS A PALATE cleanser for all that we have seen…may I present you with VIOLIN SHOW FOR BELUGA WHALES:

THAT IS IT. Have a beautiful week my lovely readers and PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE get the vaccine. PLEASE wear masks inside even if you’re vaccinated not just for your safety but because it means you can wait a little longer for that lip filler! I hear it hurts like a MFer.

Be safe, be kind.

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