Pop Culture Mondays/9.5.23
The TUESDAY SCHADENFREUDE Edition
Happy TUESDAY, my darling pop culture junkies. MOST of you are back at work and back at it after a long weekend and an action-packed summer.
MOST OF YOU.
Some might stilllllll be extending their summer holidays just a few more sweet sweet days. You may have gotten stuck in Europe because of the Heathrow computer meltdown last week and are just going with it. Stuck in Mallorca? It could be worse.
Literally.
You could be on the…..PLAYA. HAHAHAHAHA. BUT…we will get to this, OBVIOUSLY. But truly, we have a lot to catch up on. Like so much has happened this past week it is actually impossible to keep it all straight. Or to cover it all here. We have disgraced anti-semitic rappers getting what seems like a BJ for all the world to see on a boat in Venice. Gross. We have a YouTube mommy vlogger arrested for horrible child abuse. We have our current favorite tech billionaire (like, for real, someone we love and is doing god’s work) out there defending us from right-wing misogynist trolls. We have COCO. WE HAVE COCO. But then we also have Oprah and the Rock being cringe. We have ROMPER STOMPERS and TABI SWIPERS (I will translate, don’t you worry) and so much more.
In case you missed last week’s podcast…well, PLEASE SUBSCRIBE wherever you listen, and PLEASE GIVE IT 5 STARS. Leave a review! But here is last week’s epi:
Grab some headphones, some rosary beads or whatever it is you use to keep you out of Hell…because we are going DARK.
SCHADENFREUDE IS A HELL OF A DRUG:
Seriously, who needs molly or ketamine? Many people around the world are high on schadenfreude right now — and what a high it is — and normally it is not something we feel good about having but this hits different. Am I right? We all know the story by now. Burning Man got rained out. While everyone had access to the SAME weather reports as the rest of us, the Burners would not be dissuaded by a little rain in the forecast. Nope. They had heard it all before, so despite the warnings, the organizers and Burners decided to proceed.
Now, look, before I go into the reasons why we relish this moment so much, let me give you a little background. I remember my first encounter with Burning Man, which was back in 1997. YEP, that’s right kids. Burning Man is not a product of the last decade…it was a thing before the Internet was a THING. I mean in 1997, the people I met who were prepping for Burning Man were “sort of” rich tech dudes. The kind of rich who had a ski boat on the Bay in San Francisco and a cool condo in Russian Hill or houseboat in Sausalito. They were the kind of rich with a cool yet modest beach house on the Big Island in Hawaii. The kind of rich who could afford to get cool clothes made or procured from stylists at a time when I was having a panic attack buying a pair of Steve Madden slides. There was no Facebook. No Twitter. No Instagram or TikTok. I mean FFS, there was NO Google. We didn’t even text, and BBM hadn’t even come out yet as we didn't yet have Blackberrys. We were little wildlings. HOW did we survive?? But my point is, the event meant something different back then, and even though I was still like, “yeah, no thank you…” it had a bit of mystique and coolness to it. That was until one of those sort of rich tech friends of mine left their Burning Man grocery store list in my car, and I remember it like it was yesterday.
- 14 jars of capers
- A fuck ton of smoked salmon
- 3 dozen bagels (NOT frozen)
- 8 cases of sparkling water
I mean I could go on. But I shall not.
Those “sort of” rich tech dudes I knew in 1997 are now the ultra mega-rich beyond-your-imagination tech dudes we all know today. Some of them still go and annoy the fuck out of us. And some have moved on. But I guess my point is that it might have started as something different and cool and counter-culture. But as these things tend to do, it evolved (or devolved) into something more basic, inauthentic, and a symbol of excess. And a place where rich people can go and get laid and do drugs. Basically.
So here we are. The EXODUS, as the Burners call it, is still happening, and it apparently has not been all peace and love. The 10 Principles Of Burning Man include things like LEAVE NO WASTE, which is funny because there is a SHIT ton of waste left behind.
But let’s back up. We, the public, started hearing about the drama happening ON THE PLAYA late last week thanks to all the TikToks and Instagram stories. I loved how everyone was like, “I am sneaking a little wifi…” I mean, for a place about disconnecting…there are a lot of social media posts, my friends. JUST SAYING. Then we saw people bailing….most notably Diplo and Chris Rock, who had to walk 6 hours before getting picked up by fans on the road. The PLAYA (eye roll) is not regular dirt or sand. It’s an alkaline mineral as it was once a lake bed. SO mixed with rain, it doesn't so much become MUD per se, but basically a clay. A thick, heavy, daunting kind of clay that literally stops you in your tracks.
Ah yes, get these men a cold brew stat. It's probably the most relatable thing Chris Rock has ever said, but that’s another story. The IRONY here is, that Burning Man is meant to be this utopian place where money means nothing…everyone is equal and respectful and in it together. It’s a shared pain if you will as even in the best of weather, it is not easy.
But that’s not what it is. The rich rich have amazing camps with RVs with their own bathrooms and beds and catering and while I cannot verify I imagine they eat caviar and drink rose while dressed in thousands of dollars of Mad Max get up their stylists procured for them. While others have really sacrificed to spend the money it costs to get a ticket and they are in tents directly in the mud. The rich rich can just walk out of there and leave their shit behind. Jeep stuck in the mud? Byeeeee Jeep. They took what they could carry and left the rest of their shit for others to deal with.
Many bailed. I saw people I know defend their reasons for leaving their stuff behind with every excuse.
And look, if I had been there, I would have totally bailed. NO question. But also, I never would have been there. But let’s show a few of the TikToks and then discuss why so many people are getting joy from seeing this unfold (other than we are all depraved humans!)
The comments on this one kill me.
“Leave no trace.”
“It’s giving Pompeii…”
“That’s Mother Earth’s Jeep now..”
KILLS ME.
“Sorry about the commercial plug…” all the rules have been thrown out the window.
And this seems to be the sentiment all around the socials:
And man oh man, the schadenfreude is REAL:
AND this is probably why I am single, but this is basically every guy on Raya (sorry):
WHY DOES THIS TRIGGER ME SO MUCH? Maybe because I just got back from Israel, where the learnings of what EXODUS really means to so many is fresh in my brain. The Burning of the man, the temple, the exodus….look, there are two types of people: him and me.
Anyway, they burned THE MAN last night, and while thousands have already left…thousands more are on their exodus. This is what that looks like:
SO. Here we are. We have a lot of defensive burners right now telling everyone this was not as big a deal as the media have portrayed and others saying they are thankful to be alive. And one person lost their life..which all the Burners seem to brush aside…like this one:
SIGH.
So here we are. The President was briefed on the situation. The National Guard did NOT, in fact, go to Burning Man, but apparently were briefed and ready to be activated. Do you know what it takes to tap into THOSE resources? Apparently, some fighting is breaking out during the “exodus,” and the site has been left, in some places, a total mess.
What will become of this event? WE SHALL SEE. In the meantime, there will be some of us who defend it and some of us who gain pleasure in its unraveling.
HUMANITY!
SHAKSHUKA GATE:
WHO knew Shakshuka could be so triggering?? Well, to a bunch of ultra-right-wing, super uptight, misogynistic male trolls…it SURE IS. For those of you who are not familiar with the incredible Shakshuka dish, it involves eggs, tomatoes, and spices. Come on over to my place as I am in the process of teaching myself how to make them as I brought Shakshuka spices home from Israel. Oh, also I am single and child-free and slept in on Saturday and watched a movie while sipping coffee. I AM A HORRIBLE MONSTER.
At least according to right-wing political commentator Matt Walsh.
First, let me introduce you to the adorable Julia Mazur, a TikTok creator. This is the TikTok that triggered a bunch of angry, hateful white men with TOO much time on their small hands.
And boy did the little hateful right-wingers with small hands get their panties in a twist over this.
Ah yes. the sad little man got TRIGGERED BIGLY.
But then…we had an unexpected and yet VERY appreciated defender come in the form of the one and only MARK CUBAN. He came in like a big brother, a girl dad if you will of THE ENTIRE INTERNET.
Now, before I go on, I have known Mark for a long time. He is the real deal. He is kind and fun and is a tells-it-like-it-is kind of guy. He has a sense of humor and also calls out bullshit. He does not live in an ivory tower where he lost his grip on reality and what is really happening in the world.
And we love him for it.
Ok, let’s continue.
Ladies and Gents….we have the official TROLL OF TROLLS enter the picture, STEPHEN MILLER. Yeah, THAT guy.
My fave comment on this post is def:
BUT….I digress.
And then Mark Cuban did what we only dream the rich and powerful would do….HE RESPONDS PERFECTLY. He hits all the points:
- Shows respect for the woman
- Shows thoughtfulness and compassion
- Shares real business mentorship
- AND ASKS STEPHEN MILLER WHO HURT HIM basically.
Seriously Mark….we fucking LOVE you.
He didn’t stop there. In response to yet another ridiculous tweet/post whatever we are fucking calling it this week from Matt Walsh, Cubes goes in like a champion fighter in the ring with Urkel:
The Bud Light reference. Nice touch.
It goes on but here’s the deal. All the boys like David Sacks and others who truly believe they are bringing wisdom and insight to their followers could only dream of being this effective and impactful as Cuban is. ONLY DREAM:
But let’s not take away from the true hero here. And that is Julie Mazur. Who was under attack as a result of the little man with small hands named Matt Walsh. His followers came after her telling her she should be raped and killed and so many awful things. And to say she handled it with grace is an understatement.
So this week, hats off to you, Julie. And to you, Mark, the ultimate GIRL DAD. Thanks for having our backs.
A LITTLE OF THIS, A LITTLE OF THAT:
I know I know it is LATE…I hate writing on Tuesdays, and I am SO behind because, you know…real life and my job, and ok, it is 11:30 AM PT as I write this, so forgive me if it’s a little rushed. I just want to make sure you are in the KNOW my darlings, so below find a hodge podge of other things happening at the moment.
The Biebers:
Last week launched a funny meme because Hailey Bieber and Justin continue to go out together in vastly different looks. She always looks amazing and he always looks like he's being dropped off at daycare.
Here are some of my faves:
Excuse Me, Sir?
Yes, well this was a delight. Kanye and his “wife” as she is always referred to, were spotted on a boat in Venice with his ASS literally out, and she is in a questionable position now Venice is investigating, and they are banned from the boating company in Venice and all around, nope.
I mean this woman looks miserable. Is she OK???
When a Good Deed Goes Wrong:
We all remember that moment early in lockdown when all the celebs did a video singing IMAGINE while hanging in their mansions while the rest of us kept our boxes outside for days and we washed our fruit in bleach? Yeah good times.
So, here we are in the 2023 version. Remember when I was just talking about Mark Cuban and how despite him being super rich, he is not out of touch? Yeah, well…the same cannot be said for Oprah. I imagine her team is either too terrified to tell her things or she surrounds herself with people who would never consider saying no to her. Either way, this was never going to be received well. It is always a hard pill to swallow when billionaires ask regular people to donate to a cause. Even with the best of intentions, I think people are aware enough to realize Oprah could write one check way bigger than what her fund might raise and at zero impact to her, and all would be ok. But also, like her big AH HAH moment about what they could do?
Well, as they said in the old days….ROLL TAPE:
We can dissect this for hours but basically, the takeaway is…NO.
So yes, she is right…getting money INTO the hands of those who need it quickly is absolutely key. And what they're right about, though they don’t reallllly explain it well, is that big organizations that have money to deploy for these events are not able to do so quickly. SO much red tape. It takes ages. AND there are ways around that through smaller organizations which I think is what they are trying to say, but just not effectively. SIGH. The responses have not been kind.
And then this…
You know what this comes down to? A BREAKDOWN IN COMMUNICATIONS. The power of storytelling is REAL…just as much as it can help, it can hurt. And that’s my plug for the day of what I do for my real job! Oprah, call me. 🥰
But if interested in donating as it ultimately IS a good cause:
Coco Gauff is Everything:
Coco is the 19-year-old tennis phenom who is stealing our hearts. She is not just a superstar player, but a superstar human who is principled and plays by the rules and thinks others should too. While playing Laura Siegemund, the 35-year-old professional tennis player from Germany at the US Open this week, Coco had to correct the ref on a few things.
Like this:
Long game or not, the rules are the rules, and for a 19-year-old to have to point that out to a seasoned player and ref…I mean, good for her. I would not have had the courage at 19.
And she didn’t stop there:
This was not a petulant teenager not getting her way. This was a woman advocating for herself and calling out rules being broken and unfair behaviors.
The crowds agreed overwhelmingly with Coco and made it clear, impacting Laura to where she broke down at the press conference. To little sympathy.
But then the real kicker came out via socials. Laura, exiting the court in the tunnel, clearly said something that shocked this woman who heard it:
People were freaking out trying to lip-read what she said, some even making assumptions it was a racist comment.
But we have TikTok…so the woman’s daughter came through for all of us:
Just a little F BOMB action, nbd.
But what WAS a big deal for Coco? The BIEBS. AGAIN with the BIEBS!
(US OPEN is slightly different than Wimbledon in terms of attire…)
The Romper Stomper of 2023:
This is Dalanie DiSabato, the 21-year-old nursing student who captured our hearts when she defended her mama at a Morgan Wallen concert. So, before i show you the video, just know this. This sweet little thing has never been in a brawl before. And she acknowledges she is the one who accidentally instigated this by unknowingly cutting another young woman in line for the porta-potty. YUM. But the girl who she cut in line lost her shit and started wailing on this woman who turns out to be Dalanie’s mom….and like a GOOD DAUGHTER, she went into protection mode.
HOPEFULLY, you can see this video….Space Karen and his little dwarves have made sharing things, formerly known as tweets, tricky:
BTW I am pretty sure no one thought the woman in the white crocheted top and jean shorts was the mom as she does not look like my mom did when I was a teen but I digress.
THIS IS NEXT LEVEL.
And an icon was born.
Tabi Swiper Tok:
OK that probably means nothing to you. So let’s back up. These split-toe monstrosities, IN MY OPINION, are called Mary Jane Tabis from the brand Maison Margiela. We have spoken about them here at PCM before as the hot new shoe. SJP was just photographed in them. I do not care if Princess Diana herself came back to the earth to wear these….they are not going on my feet.
But to each their own.
And certainly, NO one should be stealing your shoes. Especially if it was a hook up….here’s the story that played out on TikTok:
BUT she let the Internet do its thing, and she got them back!!! The guy had truly given them to his GF. I mean WTF.
She even had the moment she got them back…RECORDED:
And this was the best explainer of all:
AND Lastly….
Let me preface this by saying we love Seed, the pro-biotic brand. Female founder, amazing brand, product, vision, and the whole thing is a yes from me. And apparently, GP, aka Gwenyth Paltrow. Who, I guess, was making a sponsored post or maybe just a post about a brand she loves, but it is being torn apart by the socials. I think it was endearing…it’s down now but captured by creators. Look, GP is in her kitchen, and her teenage son is steaming milk loudly AS ONE DOES, and the whole thing IS SO on-brand for GP it’s perfect tbh. Seed should be thrilled….reminded me I need to re-order mine. But admittedly, it’s funny:
THAT IS IT, my darlings…
OK omg it is 1:15. I have to GOOOOOOO. I skipped over some stuff. Like Elon suing the Anti-Defamation League for Defamation. He is literally saying advertisers bailed on the platform because the ADL accused him of being anti-Semitic, which um…he has been? Putting the advertisers in discovery….just what they will love!
I am also skipping over Timothee and Kylie confirming their relationship at Beyoncé last night…I am not able to come to terms with it tbh.
We are not ok.
I skipped over the mommy vlogger who was arrested for child abuse because I don’t have the heart tbh to get into it. But if you want to read more:
I have to eat and walk the dog. Have a magical week, everyone!
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Xx,
Brooke
