Unusual Namedrop Power Hour
The celebrity namedrop is a staple of popular music. From a nod to the Rockefellers in “Puttin’ on the Ritz” to Judy Garland singing “Dear Mr. Gable,” the gambit has been around for decades. Depending on how you use it, it’s an effective way to put a timestamp on a song, to show that you’re hip to what the kids are into, or to taunt a rival musician.
These days, we most frequently hear rappers namechecking each other, using various sports metaphors, or calling out fashion designers, while artists in other genres mainly use other musician’s names to evoke a mood.
The songs on this playlist make atypical use of the namedrop. Whether they’re mentioning a celebrity who’s so “of-the-moment” as to be irrelevant before the song even leaves the charts, calling out a historical figure who’s never earned a mention on pop radio before, or stepping outside their genre for an offbeat reference, these songs make for a peculiarly star-studded edition of Power Hour.
1. TiK ToK — Ke$ha
“We kick ’em to the curb unless they look like Mick Jagger”
Why Mick Jagger? A bizarre choice of heartthrob for an electro-pop starlet, right? Let’s examine the four possibilities:
- Ke$ha (or, these days, just Kesha-with-an-S) is actually attracted to the aging rocker
- It’s an easy rhyme for “swagger”
- Mick Jagger is a tool used by a media conglomerate to further their own success (a conspiracy popularized on Reddit)
- Mick Jagger is Kesha’s father (an unsubstantiated rumor that went semi-viral on Facebook shortly after TiK ToK’s breakthrough)
No need to speculate: we have the answer. In a 2013 interview, Kesha revealed her genuine attraction to Jagger via her attraction to his young doppelgänger, Harry Styles.
(On a related note, I’m not sure what it feels like to wait up “feelin’ like P. Diddy.”)
2. Tonight, Tonight — Hot Chelle Rae
“It kind of looks just like you, mixed with Zach Galifianakis.”
Let’s be clear about one thing: Zack Galifianakis is not a movie star. Sure, the Hangover franchise is the greatest success story in the history of R-rated comedies (even with Part III relatively bombing), but the guy can’t exactly carry a movie on his own shoulders.
So why choose the goofy, rotund, bearded A-minus-lister as the subject of what I hope is an entirely fictional tattoo? Cuz it’s funny, I guess. I do have to admit that I still chuckle when I hear the unexpected, off-kilter lyric. Chances are, though, in 10 years, most won’t know who the hell Hot Chelle Rae is talking about.
Then again, they won’t know who Hot Chelle Rae was, either.
3. Buddy Holly — Weezer
“I look just like Buddy Holly… and you’re Mary Tyler Moore.”
What does Mary Tyler Moore have to do with Buddy Holly, a rock legend who died tragically more than a decade before she achieved fame? I don’t know.
Wikipedia tells me that the song originally referenced Ginger Rogers and Fred Astaire, an onscreen-and-offscreen couple that would have made for a much more sensible pairing. Though I just can’t get that version of the song to stick in my head quite the same way.
4. Riptide — Vance Joy
“I swear she was destined for the screen / Closest thing to Michelle Pfeiffer that you’ve ever seen.”
Early 2015 founded music fans everywhere asking one question: “Why is Michelle Pfeiffer mentioned in two current pop songs?” (Don’t bother reading the article I just linked to; it’s not very good and doesn’t even attempt to answer the question).
For his part, Vance Joy is a big Michelle Pfeiffer fan, and specifically had Catwoman in mind when he mentioned her on “Riptide.”
5. Oxford Comma — Vampire Weekend
“First it’s to the window / Then it’s to the wall / Lil’ Jon, he always tells the truth”
Vampire Weekend’s Ezra Koenig evidently remembers his middle school dances with a certain level of fondness and clarity, so much so that he pays not-even-kind-of-subtle homage to Lil’ Jon & The East Side Boyz’ deliciously filthy “Get Low” throughout “Oxford Comma,” the standout track from the band’s self-titled debut.
(Let’s pretend I didn’t just write a 49-word sentence, by the way).
Anyway, honesty is not a quality I typically associate with the Father of Crunk Rock, but, window-to-wall apparently being the order in which “it” goes, who am I to argue?
6. Year 3000 — Jonas Brothers
“Everyone bought our seventh album; we had outsold Kelly Clarkson.”
Listen, I love Kelly Clarkson.
(You: then why hasn’t she been mentioned in this blog before?
Me: Shut the fuck up).
I love Kelly Clarkson. But here’s the thing. This Jonas Brothers classic is a cover, and the original lyric, as performed by the band Busted, is “we had outsold Michael Jackson.”
Let me tell you something: I love Kelly Clarkson, but outselling her is not that big a deal compared to outselling Michael Jackson. Don’t sell yourselves short, JoBros.
Also, taking almost a millennium to get a song to multi-platinum is kind of pathetic. You’re the Jonas Brothers, not Rita Ora.
7. Don’t Trust Me — 3Oh!3
“Shush, girl. Shut your lips. Do the Helen Keller, and talk with your hips.”
As far as offensive, deeply-ableist namedrops in pop songs go… well, this is the only one I can think of. As tasteless as it gets, but endlessly quotable.
8. Promiscuous — Nelly Furtado vs. Timbaland
“Is your game MVP like Steve Nash?”
Think fast: who was the NBA’s Most Valuable Player in 2006?
Oh… you knew that? Other people know sports things? Never mind, then.
I thought it was an weird and specific reference, but I guess I was wrong.
Forget it. Just keep scrolling.
9. Barbra Streisand — Duck Sauce
“Barbra Streisand… Barbra Streisand… Barbra Streisand…”
Umm.. I’m not sure what happened here. I’m not sure how this dance track works as well as it does, but it just works. With seven mentions of the full name “Barbra Streisand” and an additional 15 utterances of “Barbra,” it’s not a lyrical masterpiece, but it’s a bop and a half.
10. So What — P!nk
“The waiter just took my table / and gave it to Jessica Simps-shit!”
“So What” is a song that takes place in a cutthroat world where vindictive food service workers will seat you only to ruthlessly swap you out for a slightly-less-famous person. How much this world aligns with our reality is unclear to this writer.
11. Inuition — Jewel
“You learn love from Charlie Sheen”
Folk chanteuse Jewel took a sharp left turn by releasing the poppy Intuition and its title track. “Intuition” earns its spot in this playlist by namedropping Charlie Sheen, who at the time of the song’s release had earned a Golden Globe for his role on Spin City and been married twice. He had also courted controversy, dating porn stars and, during his first marriage, using an escort service.
What Jewel is getting at is: Charlie Sheen is not a strong romantic role model.
12. Bo$$ — Fifth Harmony
“Boss / Michelle Obama / Purse so heavy /Gettin’ Oprah dollars”
The Michelle Obama shoutout is an unusual one in that it intends to be empowering, but the fixation on money makes it tonally awkward. Sure, Michelle Obama made some good money in her day, though not nearly as much as the rumors would have you believe, and certainly not Oprah dollars.
Later in the song, the girls tell us that Michelle, not the Commander-in-Chief, wears the proverbial pants in the First Family: “I’m on my Michelle Obama / Shh… Shut your mouth / Boy I think you know who run this house.”
Barack’s gotten his fair share of positive shout-outs in songs by major artists (he’s certainly fared better than George W. Bush in that regard), so it’s nice to see Mrs. Obama get a turn.
13. Uma Thurman — Fall Out Boy
“She wants to dance like Uma Thurman / Bury me ’til I confess / She wants to dance like Uma Thurman / and I can’t get you out of my head”
During this song’s time on the charts, both of my parents asked me, multiple times, “Who is Uma Thurman, and why does this man’s ladyfriend want to dance like her?”
Look, my parents aren’t as cool as yours, as evidenced by a gross lack of familiarity with the epic “Twist” scene in Pulp Fiction (as well as, I assume, every other scene in Pulp Fiction).
I, too, want to dance like U-ma Thur-man.
14. Uptown Funk — Mark Ronson ft. Bruno Mars
“This hit / that ice cold / Michelle Pfeiffer / that white gold”
Michelle Pfeiffer got a lot of radio play in early 2015, including this namedrop in the opening lines of one of the biggest hits of all time. This Pfeiffer reference is widely believed to be a nod to her role in Scarface, white gold being, of course, cocaine. (Fun fact: the meticulous Bowdlerizers over at Kidz Bop didn’t catch it, and left the lyric intact for their version).
15. Thrift Shop — Macklemore & Ryan Lewis ft. Wanz
“Probably should have washed this / Smells like R. Kelly’s sheets / (Piss)”
Macklemore surely thought he was being clever here, giving R. Kelly what he deserves with a dubious shout-out in a massive #1 hit. I’m just not sure that I need thinly-disguised references to the sexual assault of a minor in an otherwise joyful rap-pop song. But, shit, it was 99 cents.
16. I’m So Tired — The Beatles
“I’ll have another cigarette, and curse Sir Walter Raleigh. He was such a stupid get.”
The “get” here is a form of the British slang “git,” a term that Wikipedia, without even cracking a smile, describes as somewhere between “twit” and “twat” in severity.
While the namedrop seems unusual at first, a little context brings clarity: explorer Sir Walter Raleigh is known for, among other things, bringing tobacco to Britain. Thus, John Lennon is here blaming Raleigh for his smoking habit. Clever gent.
