Life Goals: Focus On The Right Stuff
My birthday was last weekend. June is always such a rush because not only do I have a birthday in June, but I share the month with three other members of my immediate family. I also have a wedding anniversary in June. And something else that I always forget. I’m actually lucky if I remember to get gifts, cards, and acknowledge everyone appropriately on their special day.
This birthday was a good one, just as awesome as the others to date, but getting more special with each passing year. Not only have I made it this far, but my parents have as well, and my family is healthy and together. Not many people my age get to enjoy a birthday celebration with their parents, eating fried chicken that my Mom worked hard to make for us. I had my favorite niece in from California, and my other favorite niece was with her. Everyone made it but my oldest kid, but he is working in another state banking cash over the summer prepping for his senior year of college.
Once all the festivities were over, my parents took all the kids back to their house, and my and my wife got to just hang out and talk. Each spending some time thinking and just enjoying the night.
Life Goals — The Revised Edition
- Spend more time with family and friends.
- Work on skills that create value.
- Spend time focusing on myself.
Family and Friends.
I enjoy spending time with the people in my life. There are definitely people that I wish I spent more time with, so I’m trying to get to that. Some requires travel, which is cool too. See some cool places and people at the same time. Remember kids: you don’t have to be biologically related to someone for them to be your family. And on the same note, just because you are biologically related to someone doesn’t mean you have to take shit off them.
Goal: Spend time with your family and people you like being around.
Skills to pay the bills. Education is not expensive, but college is, and there is a huge difference. Does that make sense? You do not need to go to college to get an education. Public libraries are free, and you can check out books and read them — for free. EdX and Coursera have made learning available to anyone with an internet connection. Which you can also get at your local library for free. Join Upwork and start doing some freelance work. You know something, or how to do something, that others will pay you for.
Goal: Focus on educating yourself and gaining skills that you can use to earn money.
Selfish as it sounds, I’ve realized that I don’t do enough shit for myself. I started running about two years ago, and that led to joining a gym, and then doing resistance training on machines, then free weights, and now I’m up to benching 225 again and feel awesome. I can run faster and farther now that I could 10 years ago and that’s an amazing feeling.
I’m also learning to meditate, reading widely, and have started using custom handmade soap in the shower. Soap for dudes. Yeah man. Crazy as it sounds, all of this is really quality of life stuff that doesn’t cost much more that a cup of Dunkin’ a day.
Goal: Focus on yourself.
What to do?
I have spent a good bit of my life focusing on the wrong stuff. But in my defense, most of us do, because that’s what we are taught to do in the traditional, public school system. It is not our parents fault, they only want the best for us. So when our schools and our parents all tell us to get an education, get a job, buy a house, get married, have kids, etc. that’s what we do.
We are doing what those before us have told us to do, because that is what they were told to do.
When you talk to older people they tell you to live now. Most of them don’t come right and out tell you to just say “Fuck it” and roll on, but that’s the nutshell version.
We obviously need money to live, but do we really need money for a Rolex, swimming pool, and 4,000 square foot house? I like the semi-luxurious lifestyle I’ve created for myself, but at the same time I’ve created a monster.
All this shit requires maintenance and taxes, so we slug off to work to hump away in a cubicle for some dickhead who’s only skill is telling his boss wether or not we were on time and sitting at our desk in the morning.
I’m thinking it’s time to start divesting myself of some of this shit over the next few years and hitting the road for awhile.
My wife and I bought a killer camper last year and have enjoyed quite a few camping trips over the past few months. I don’t know about full timing, but a month at the beach now and then really puts things into perspective.
I throw a little SoCo in my Coke and start talking shit.
Then kick back as the June lightening bugs twinkle in search of a mate, spread out across the bottom field, disappearing into the dark outline of the Blue Ridge, bordering an insanely clear sky, smeared by the Milky Way and it’s supporting cast of distant stars.
This isn’t going to last forever. Be here now.