Break The Pattern And Be A Person
Not every human interaction feels entirely human. There are so many unconscious patterns embedded in everyone that it’s possible to go an entire day without having an authentic, original exchange.
That’s a real shame because every moment is truly unique, and by falling back on our programmed responses we deny ourselves the chance to experience that truth directly.
Patterns offer predictability in a world of uncertainty and provide a foundation for originality. For instance, when I meet someone new I don’t have to invent the process of shaking hands and exchanging names, but I am free to use the pattern to create a genuine connection.
Bees are using the hell out of the hexagon, but it’s the pollen not the pattern that makes their honey sweet. With attention, we can leverage the typically scripted interactions in life to create something new and amazing.
There’s a moment in the HBO series Westworld when Bernard wants to have a serious chat with an android named Dolores. He instructs her to “drop all scripted responses, use improvisation only.” He doesn’t want to hear a pattern, he wants to hear a person. (It goes way beyond that, and if one of your patterns involves binge streaming, do yourself a favor and queue it up.)
Patterns are useful but they limit our potential for real connection. There’s nothing new under the sun (see what I did there? ← And there?), but even though “it is what it is”, it doesn’t really have to be.
If we practice seeing our patterns we can interrupt them with flair. Drop all scripted responses, improvisation only.
