Effort Over Excuses: Embracing Your Writing Dreams
Inspired by a beautiful and honest quote that resonates deeply with me.
I read this line in a story about a young girl who faced numerous physical handicaps but harboured a profound aspiration to become a medical doctor.
Her attitude towards attaining that goal is eloquently captured in this beautiful quote :
“If it wasn’t meant to be then it wouldn’t happen, but I wasn’t going to let a lack of effort on my part be the reason why I didn’t become a doctor” — Jeniffer Arnold MD, M.Sc
My biggest dream is to be a writer. I want to inspire, encourage, and entertain with my words.
And what have I done with it so far?
As I write this, I am visiting my father after six months. He lives in a village and the monsoons are going crazy here. The trees surrounding his house have grown taller and greener. I can close my eyes and pretend that I am in the middle of a forest.
Thankfully, I also find that I am not worried about any deadline when I return to work in two days.
That has led to an honest introspection. I realised these things about me:
- “Worry Goals” have been sabotaging my long-term goals
- I am STILL concerned about what other people will think
- A part of me does believe (not all the time, but sometimes) that I am too old to pursue a lifelong dream
Now let’s look at these one by one and see how much of it is true and how much is old scripts running in my head.
What are “worry goals”?
To write and to be very good at it has been a childhood dream. I have kept pushing it to the back of the queue to attain an immediate or urgent goal — often, these were “worry goals”; not any dream projects or mission-critical tasks.
These are often stuff that I do (or don't do) because I am worried about something. A very good example would be — I am so worried about an upcoming client pitch that I skip my morning walk.
Why do I still care about what other people think?
Intellectually, you and I know that what other people think does not matter. But we have been hard-wired into a social construct where validation from external sources is equated to progress.
I took a break of six months a year ago. I used to get calls twice a day from close family asking why I was wasting my life. I had a lot of plans for the break but I achieved very little as I spent most of the time justifying my break to others.
As long as you are not financially dependent on others, as long as you can take care of your near and dear ones, you don't really owe an explanation to anyone. But as Indians, we have been brought up to be SO friggin polite we don't even know how to establish boundaries and cut out toxic people.
These days I have a morning meditation practice at the end of which I consciously make myself “look within” and remind myself that the path is more important — not validation from anyone else.
Am I too old for all this?
Now, in addition to dealing with “worry goals” and seeking validation, I face an additional challenge.
I’m in my 40s, holding a senior position with a demanding 9-to-9 job (nope, not a typo), and here I am, stating my goals as if I were a teenager. At work, I lead teams, serve as a source of guidance, and bear the responsibility of achieving six-figure targets in pursuit of my professional objectives.
Doesn’t it sound somewhat juvenile for a “seasoned professional” like me to be starting from scratch with such ambitious goals? Shouldn’t I be out there, projecting an image of having already accomplished something in life and being a “cool” individual who’s been there and done that?
Insecurities and self-doubts are inherent in any path one chooses. I don’t know anyone who is exempt from these feelings. However, as long as you remain focused on your goals and are willing to put in the effort, you’ll draw significantly closer to achieving them.
Now coming back to the favourite quote (because it’s worth repeating) :
“If it wasn’t meant to be then it wouldn’t happen, but I wasn’t going to let a lack of effort on my part be the reason why I didn’t become a doctor” — Jeniffer Arnold MD, M.Sc
No matter what you aspire to achieve, regardless of your age or your personal and professional responsibilities, if you genuinely pursue it, there’s a strong likelihood you’ll reach your goal.
And even if you don’t succeed, at the very least, it won’t be because you were too afraid to attempt it.
It’s perfectly acceptable to experience failure, even failure on a grand scale. As you grow older, your regrets will not stem from your failures but rather from a lack of effort.
