Office dog shining light in otherwise miserable hell-scape of an office
Of all the employees at H.H.&P. there is one who stands above all (figuratively). His name is Mr. Gizmo and he has everyone around the water cooler buzzing with delight. “Most of the time here I feel like I’m swamped with work and really stressed out, so it’s nice that our CEO brings in Gizmo to boost moral.” Says project manager Helen Schmidt. “People are always instagramming and snapping his little furry face, it’s a great way to stave off the thoughts of the darkness that will eventually consume us all.”
Mr. Gizmo arrives every day like any other employee and even has his own miniature desk complete with a dog toy computer, dog toy phone, and a nice little bed for him to catch some z’s. Even newer employees such as Cecilia Broughner are finding that Gizmo is really the star of the office. “I’ve been here for a few months and it’s really taken a toll. I can’t sleep and I’ve lost around 20–25 lbs since I started, even if I had time to eat I’ve mostly lost my appetite for anything. Food is the enemy, I know this now. The work is oppressive and uncreative and made for ungrateful and unimaginative clients. Most days people are here late pushing campaigns live or catching up on emails, or screaming and crying into the void. So those days that Gizmo is around really help boost everyone’s mood.”
Mr. Gizmo has even found some online presence through Instagram amassing a hearty following of 3K people to follow his silly exploits. “The other day I watched my manager staple his own hand. Instead of reacting he looked at his hand without feeling or emotion. It was like he realizes he could no longer feel anything, much less pain,” says UX designer James Crombit. “I myself just yesterday found blood and bones in my daily nervous vomit. I don’t remember eating bones. You don’t think those were my bones?”
You can follow Mr Gizmo on instagram to see all his delightful pics at H.H.& P. and please follow the link and donate to the H.H.& P. Employee Mysterious Death Memorial and Prevention Fund.
