10 Steps to Solve Your Conflict

Difficult as you might find it, conflict in a natural part of everyday life. Whether that’s conflict in your relationships, or even with yourself, you’ll find that you cannot avoid conflict entirely.

Which doesn’t mean that conflict has to dominate your life. At Priizm, we’re dedicated to helping you to overcome the challenges that you face in life — not by doing it for you, but by equipping you with the tools and skills that you need to get by.

So if you’re suffering with the kind of conflict you can’t see a resolution for, then here’s a life-coach approved way to coach yourself to clarity, solution, and most importantly: a resolution!

The Drama Triad

For conflict resolution, it’s first of all important to remember that conflict isn’t just something that happens to you. Whether we know it or not, we are all willing participants in any conflict. Discover the role you’re playing by viewing it through the “Drama Triad”:

● Who is the victim?

● Who is the perpetrator/villain in the situation?

● Who is the rescuer?

10 Steps to Conflict Resolution

Before you start this exercise, grab a laptop or your phone (or a pen and piece of paper if you’re about that analog life), and find an area where you can sit and be alone with your thoughts.

Close your eyes and take three deep breaths.

Now, think about your particular problem. Really feel it. Sit in it for a moment.

When you’re ready, write down the answers to the following 5 questions.

1. What is the problem?
2. What bothers you about the problem?
3. What else?
4. What bothers you MOST about it?
5. What emotion are you feeling right now about it?
6. Who are you in the drama triad?
7. How can you look at this in a different way?
8. What’s one thing that you could do between now and next week?
9. Check in with yourself and become aware of how you’re feeling after considering questions 7 & 8.
10. What might be in the way of you looking at this in a different way, or taking action on one thing you can do by next week?

And there you have it. If you’ve made it through these ten steps, you’ve completed what we refer to as an authentic inquiry. This will give you the mental space to understand what you need to do, and how best you can go about doing it.

Of course, if you need any help clarifying any part of these steps, or assistance in removing the reason you’re not taking the action, why not give us a call or a chat? After all, that’s exactly what we’re here for.