A Transgender Woman Stuck in a Guy HAZMAT suit:
It doesn’t hurt. It lets me survive in a very hostile world but my female gender gets itchy.
For very personal reasons I continue to straddle my gender presentation between my female soul and the male façade that I wear to survive. As time has progressed in my transition, my male persona seems less and less real and my natural female gender becomes more dominant.
It feels like an entirely natural progression.
It should be.
I was misgendered by the doctors at birth, by my parents who raised me, and the society I grew up in… but what did they know? My penis was all they needed to label my gender. Fairly, at my birth, how could they know? The gender odds were in their favor to get it right.
But they got it wrong.
It took 60 years to get my gender right finally but I still need to keep a toe in old gender for now.
It can get confusing.
For those who try to read me, am I mtf or ftm?
For the majority who aren’t transgender, “mtf” is “male to female”, “ftm” is “female to male”. It means the direction of your transition. For example, I am mtf because I was born with physical male genitalia but my brain was…
