Can We Talk About Queer Breakup and Heartbreak?
A Prism & Pen writers prompt
One of my best friends (who is one of the founders of Prism & Pen) is a transgender man going through heartbreak. His first love just broke up with him, and his pain has been wrenching to observe even from a distance. He’s hurting bad, and I’m doing my best to support him, but I can only do so much.
His pain is compounded because he’s closeted by practical necessity. Most of the people in his daily life are very homophobic and transphobic. He can’t share important truths about his relationship and how it ended. Reaching out for support is really tough when reaching out means sharing only a sliver of his truth.
I lived that personally!
When my partner Lenny died in 1999, I was beyond bereft. I’ll never forget my first (or was it my second?) day back at work. I was sitting in a client’s conference room doing contract work. His firm was small, he was the boss, and we had clicked, both of us former Marines.
After lunch, he came in and sat down beside me. “You need to talk about anything, Jarhead? You look like your best friend just died.”
“Actually,” I stuttered, “Um … my, my, um, … my wife died last week.”
