LGBTQIA/Relationships/Halloween
I Did Drag Once and That Was Enough
Adjusting to a new life as a gay man was fraught with danger
After coming out in 1986, my first gay friends were a group of men I met in a support group for gay fathers. In those days, being a “gay father” almost always meant you’d had children with a woman to whom you’d been married.
I had joined the support group to help with the transition from straight to gay. My closest friends from the group and I were all in our early forties and beginner-gays.
Halloween is a special holiday for LGBTQ+ people. It has little to do with its historical roots and customs. For gay people, Halloween has more to do with celebrating our roles as society’s outsiders. It is a way to find humor in life’s absurdities and misfortunes. It also has a lot to do with having fun.
My new friends and I decided if we were going to be gay, we’d jump in with both feet, and that meant doing drag for Halloween. The plan was for us to meet in drag for dinner and then move to the gay disco in Des Moines, Iowa. Although we were outsiders, we wanted to make a statement by eating out in a restaurant.
I went to the Salvation Army to shop for a dress. I’m a big guy, so choices were limited. I found a pale…
