Miley Cyrus and my daughter’s start of 1st grade

Watched the VMA’s last night, admittedly, to see Katy Perry’s performance and the Justin Timberlake segments that didn’t include NSync. On the way to JT and the Roar finale I sat through the Miley Cyrus performance.

What…in the world…was that?!?!

Have you ever been to a talent show or open mic where someone performed a song with an over-the-top confidence that they looked and sounded amazing, that they were the star of the show and they would be everyone’s favorite act. But then when you looked around at the watching crowd you saw some people with blank looks on their faces, some trying to hide their giggles and some with crinkled eyebrows trying to figure out what in the world they were watching?

If you’ve ever been in that audience situation then you know exactly what it was like to watch Miley performing last night. And let it be clearly known that I am in no way alone in this assessment. Here was One Direction and Rhiana while she was performing:

Not standing and clapping along, just sitting with completely blank looks and smirks on some of the guy’s faces. If you watch a repeat performance, Drake isn’t even looking up at her. But the best reaction in the world was from Will Smith and his kids:

I’m sorry, but Jaden Smith’s face says it all. That’s probably what I looked like last night.
***Update*** Apparently this image of the Smith family isn’t from Miley Cyrus’ performance but from when they were watching Lady Gaga (report here). Either way — I stand by my comments. =) And the look on Jaden’s face in this image is still equal to mine while watching Miley.

As a father I have this anger, frustration and real concern about what I witnessed. I woke up still thinking about it, like a train wreck you’re still talking about days after the fact. And in the midst of it all, I took my precious daughter to the start of 1st grade a couple of hours ago. My heart breaks and cries and pleads for my little girl. I just wanted to say to her…

Baylee you are my daughter and I love you more than I can explain.
Your deep sense of care and concern for people amazes me beyond words.
You are are funny, you are smart, you are full of life, you are a leader.
You are beautiful — on the inside and on the outside.
You are beautiful because of who you are.
You are beautiful because of what God is doing in your heart.

Caring about who you are and who you are becoming is the utmost concern you should have.

Idiots are going to tell you that “no one can tell me what to do” and “I don’t care, I just want to have fun” are the best world-views to go with. Run from these people!

Fun all the time is not sustainable.
That isn’t a boring statement it’s a statement of reality.

You should have as much fun as you possibly can in life, but not at the expense of your character and identity.

Being truly funny is an art form that takes skill. Anyone can get a cheap laugh from shock humor.

Make friends who are going to get in your face and let you know you’re being stupid. Avoid the ones who are stupid-inducing.

Your sexuality is something to treasure and not put on trashy display.

Your body is something to honor and protect, not something to pass around or parade.

Your independence doesn’t mean throwing out responsibility.

Growing up doesn’t mean life is ending. Growing up means life is just beginning, with more opportunities ahead, more adventures beginning.

God’s love and grace and the gospel are things I’ll talk to you about and showing you, but you’re going to have to not just accept it because I’m telling it to you. You’re going to have to own it yourself and make those decisions for your own life.

Baylee you have so many choices ahead of you. I can coach you along the way but the decisions are ultimately in your hands. All decisions have consequences — some good and some bad. So care! Care about all this! Care about who you are and who you are becoming!

OK — I didn’t say all of that as we walked up the sidewalk to school. Would be a tad overwhelming. But it was going through my head and it is still in my heart. I’m looking forward to the daddy/daughter times we have ahead of us where I can speak these things into her, and encourage her, and empower her.

And I pray Miley has some good friends come around her to speak truth to her, not just about that performance but about life in general.

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