Leadership is not about your opinion
There is empowering leadership and disempowering leadership. Both have different ways of behaving that come from a different intention and mental model about leadership. Speaking first and offering your opinion before anyone else is a disempowering leadership pattern. Any behavior that puts too much value on your opinion is a dark leadership pattern if you ask me. It’s not persé that leaders need to speak last but that leaders should come in last, if at all, with their opinions.
Starting with your opinion
Imagine you are in a meeting and the person that starts the meeting, the person with some form of authority that tries to lead, starts with defining the problem, offering a solution, and then opening up the discussion. How open does this feel? How empowered does this feel to offer your input? How co-creative does that feel? Imagine hearing phrases like “…I don’t see any other options..” or “…when we are going to decide that, I have an opinion about that…”. That makes it even worse. So it’s about how disempowering starting with an opinion is and using phrases that show to the people in the meeting that you value your own opinion than that of others.
HiPPPOs
We all have opinions, we all have ideas. Sometimes it feels like the opinions of people with a hierarchical position are more important that people with a lower position in the org chart. HiPPO we call that: the Highest Paid Person’s Opinion. And that is dangerous because the highest paid person (usually the person highest is the org chart) does not always have the best ideas. And if you create a culture where the opinion of the highest paid person is more important than that of others, you run the risk of ending up withn suboptimal solutions. You will definitely not create a culture of co-creations where everyone feels safe and heard. Challenging the HiPPO is still possible but it takes a lot of energy and you run the risk of creating conflict. It stifles co-creation and innovation.
Everyone is entitled to an opinion, even the highest paid person. The thing to be aware of is the effect of expression your opinion as a leader. It is very valuable to give your opinion when people ask for it. But when you start with your opinion of you indicate that your opinion is more valuable than that of other, do not expect much input, people feeling seen and empowered, co-creation, and a feeling of safety.
Starting with a question
That doesn’t mean you should speak last. I think a leader should speak first but what is said first should be about the framing, the scope, and the problem at hand. A good leader asks good questions to inspire co-creation, thinking outside the box a little, to empower people. You might have your own ideas about the solution but co-creation requires an open mind and if you value your own ideas too much, your mind is closed. It’s logical that you value your own opinions more than those of others because that is traditional management culture. Some opinions are worth more than others. Maybe that is even why you wanted to be a manager, to have your opinions be worth more. That is all part of the traditional management system. Which is fine. Which has worked fine for over a century and still works fine in some contexts. But it’s important to see the limitations of valuing your own opinions too much when you want to create a culture of co-creation. It’s good to have your own ideas prior to coming up with a solution. That provides a foundation for interpreting alternative solutions offered by the group. If you have no idea up front, it’s harder to understand input from others. But hold your opinions to yourself until someone asks for it. The question should always be what the group needs. If they need your opinion, give it, if they don’t, don’t. Do not assume that your opinion is worth more or even needed. Questioning things is good if something unfolds that goes against your opinion but offering your opinion up front or indicating that your opinion will be more important shuts the door to co-creation.
But that is just my opinion :)
Thank you for taking the time to read this essay. I hope you enjoyed it. If you clap for this essay, I will know I connected with you. If you follow me here on Medium, you will see more essays pop up on your Medium homepage. You can also subscribe to an email service here on Medium which will drop new essays right into your inbox. You can also connect with me on LinkedIn to see new articles in your timeline or chat with me there.
