5 Relationship Pitfalls We Can And Must Avoid
Originally published at lmt-lss.com on January 26, 2016.
Make sure the romance never dies.
Relationships can stagnate and worsen over time. That’s why so many of them break up after a few years. To keep the spark alive, try to avoid these common relationship pitfalls.
1. Staying silent.
Avoid the temptation to stay silent, avoid or ignore the issue when your partner does something that bothers you. Silence leads to festering resentment, which leads to grudges, and can shake the foundations of a relationship. Don’t keep your anger to yourself. Express it in a calm, non accusatory manner. Honesty, openness and transparency are the key to a healthy relationship.
2. Getting possessive.
No matter how long you’ve been dating, or how close you are, your partner is not an object that you own. So they will obviously resent being treated as one. Jealousy and insecurity can ruin a relationship, and many couples fall into the trap of unconsciously getting more and more possessive of their partner as time wears on. Resist the urge to try to control your partner’s life or ask them too many questions about what they’ve been doing. It is a common relationship pitfall that can lead to cracks in the relationship.
3. Forgetting to tell them you love them.
As a relationship gets older, it’s easy to slip into a comfortable routine with your partner. Where you’re not afraid to be at your most gross with them and do goofy things together. While this is the most warm, comfortable part of a relationship, it could also be that you’re taking each other for granted. Do you frequently express your love for your partner or do you assume they know it already? If it’s the latter, it could be harming your relationship. Everyone likes to be reminded of how special they are and how much they mean to their significant other. Don’t forget to say those three magical words to your partner every now and then and express your love in other ways too.
4. Failing to listen.
If your eyes glaze over every time your partner has a heart to heart talk with you, and you silently will her/him to keep quiet so that you can watch that match in peace, your relationship could be in trouble. Lack of communication is a seemingly trivial issue that builds up over the years, and can backfire badly. If you don’t pay attention to and listen to your partner, how will you know whether they’re even happy in the relationship or not?
5. Making promises you can’t keep.
Never make a promise that you can’t or are not willing to keep. Assuring your partner that you’ll do some thing, when you have no intention of doing it, will not assuage them. It will only serve to slowly eat away the trust between you. Not only will your partner resent you for not doing it, they will also lose faith in you, and not trust you over the bigger issues in life.
Try not to make a lot of promises, and if you do-keep them!
Relationships aren’t easy; they require work. Make sure your habits are not driving your partner away.