Inner strength

Yesterday over lunch, a friend revealed some personal details about her past.

I had always known of her distant relationship with her parents, but never to the full extent. Turns out it was more than I expected: her mother was pregnant with her at 15; her grandfather was an alcoholic and committed suicide; her mother was irresponsible and used child support for herself; she did not even meet her father until she was in high school; she remains estranged with her mother today.

What a rough childhood.

When I first met her, I could have never fathomed such a tumultuous past, nor could I have felt the incredible strength she carries under her composure. Yet, while she could have easily followed her parents’ footsteps and fallen into a self-fulling prophecy, she was instead driven by their neglect to succeed, to “never be like them.”

Everyone has stories, problems, and strength I can’t see from the outside, and are far more resilient than I think. I know I’m not naturally very empathetic, and I need to remind myself to think on these before I make any judgments.

She “beat the odds” by the way, landing a full scholarship to Cal.

But her journey isn’t over yet, and I hope I can be there throughout, fully supportive as her friend.