There is a difference between big and good.

I believe in hitting redial two-hundred times to secure concert tickets.

In flipping through records in a charity shop.

I believe there is meaning in the spines of books.

In queueing at midnight for a video game.

Bit it is not that I believe in an analogue life. It is more that I sometimes want to be reminded in the effort of life.

I want things we buy to be hard to get sometimes, because it reminds us that bigger is not always better. That the ubiquity of a click does not always give us the gratification that we crave.

And that creating something of meaning to someone, is something to be treasured.

I am not saying that things should not get big because they are better, because they often do and deserve to be. When more people hear about a cool thing, and they want it, then the gift of scale is an entrepreneurial right.

I’m saying there is a difference between big and good.

The trap is when we begin to make decisions around something that is amazing, to try make it big. Or that we set out to make something big, rather than good. This usually that means we make something that isn’t very different.

Many of the things that are big and good, did not set out to be that way.

They made something so amazing, that it made a deep emotional connection with whoever consumes it. Content, products, services, that are so flawless in their quality and execution that we immediate want to tell people about it.

And the best thing about those that do big well, is that they have seen it as a chance to make that same connection with more people. They strive to scale quality, not quantity.

Yet it is always the question that we ask ourselves or each other as a lazy shortcut for quality. How big is it? Have I heard of it? How many have we sold? How will you scale?

The inspiration for this journal, came from the idea of seeking out the good. And because I have recently had a perfect reminder of what seeking quality can bring.

It comes from a question I have asked before.

When I am thinking about making any purchase, how can I make sure I buy only the things I really love?

It is a question of purpose in brands and products in our lives.

What’s it for?

Not practically. But in my life. What is it for?

Asking this question, also helps to understand that you don’t have to be against progress, or against capitalism, to be kinder to the planet.

You can even indulge yourself sometimes. Whatever that means to you. Because if it means something to you, it is important and it is human.

Finding how to do in a kind way, becomes the goal. Because indulgences are a privilege, and we should never forget how lucky we are to have them, if we can.

One of these indulgences for me, is that I like to smell fabulous.

I don’t want for much, but I do want for that. I love fragrances. I always have, and it is not particularly for anyone else. They make me feel more confident and alive. If there is a deep rooted reason for this then I am absolutely certain that I don’t care.

But I have not bought a fragrance for myself for over a year, because I can’t work out what they are for any more.

I am sure I am not buying exclusivity, given that I have been buying most of my fragrance from the duty-free or major online retailers. And I am equally sure that I am not buying the art of blending pure and natural oils. I’m not that sophisticated.

My barrier has been that mass fragrance brands are now closer to the industrial scale chemicals industry than to artisan roots. No matter how much the bottle might say otherwise. This is another trick of big, is that you can often afford to tell everyone what you have is amazing. In fact you can shout it, spam it, plaster it.

If someone tells you something is incredible, we should not believe it or feel bad if we disagree. Just as disagreeing with me right now is OK too.

Incredible is in the eye of the beholder.

So, am I buying something intangible when I buy a fragrance? Is it the image of a sports car in the desert? Or a stormy coast at sunrise? Is it the promise of a life that is better than mine? I’m happy with my life, if not exactly with the grey hair and the softer waistline but I am under no illusion that a fragrance can fix that.

I also don’t particularly want to smell like a man, or a woman. I’m also not sure I want to smell like every third person in a bar. I just want to smell like me. I want to enjoy what I smell like, and for it to make me and those around me happy.

Faced with this dilemma, there seem at first to be two main options. You can make something yourself, or you can have something made for you.

Neither of these are practical for me.

I know I like blue, but I’m not going to make my own suit. And so by the same principle, I don’t have the nose to make my own fragrance. I did consider it, and for a brief time got addicted to sniffing everything.

I found myself lingering in restaurant bathrooms to get a good read of the soap or the hand cream. Candle stores can take hours to browse. I learned from this that I like citrus notes, and I’m a big fan of calendula.

But no.

And for economic reasons, I’m also not likely to have my own fragrance made, like movie stars and lead singers do.

But … spoiler, there is another way. Please read on.

It is to ignore the mass, and to seek out the artisan. Just as you might if you seek to source the perfect drop of whiskey, or coffee bean.

To find an artisan, is to find a fragrance that is prepared in a kind but accessible way. One that is prepared for example in small batches, that is vegan, organic, or even seasonal. But also one that is prepared with love, because in the end, isn’t that what it’s all about with things that bring aesthetic beauty to our lives? To create with love. To craft our art and bring joy to the world.

As I continued my research and as I was losing hope, the answer for me seemed to fall into my life, in the way only art seems to be able to do. It sometimes takes someone to bring a different kind of magic to something, to make you see.

This magic was brought to me through an artisan fragrance house called Ffern. Located afew hundred miles from where we live.

Ffern release four fragrances per year at the turn of the season. They are my choice, and we can all have our own.

However, the creation is only the second best thing for me about Ffern. The best thing, comes from the authenticity of how quality is controlled. It is controlled through knowing how much can be produced, and producing that amount. By making limited sized batches, and making sure that scale does not compromise quality and that availability is limited to what is needed for each release.

This is done through a production ledger. And if you would like to experience their creations, you have to be on the production ledger. This ledger is a list of names, that is used to plan each production.

If you are not on that list, then you have to wait. You don’t have to know someone, or have the fastest broadband, or have the most money.

You have to wait.

It is an example of the emotional toil and care that goes into creating something that makes a difference. And if you are reading this and thinking that luxury is thing you do not need, then you are right. I have even myself written about nothing being an alternative to a purchase.

But I would also suggest that luxury and indulgence are different. We can all indulge ourselves, this is a privilege of being human.

However, I also have a strong opinion about the privilege and the deal we have on the planet. We have the privileged to do many things in our lives. And one of these is that we have this unique fortune to be humans to have organised ourselves to make and buy stuff for ourselves and each other.

It’s OK to recognise this human flaw, as long as we remember that the more frivolous the stuff we can buy is, the more privileged we are. It is easy to forget that sometimes.

But the other part, is the deal. Privilege only works if we recognise it and we recognise how lucky we are. And that we use it to look after each other.

We choose carefully, for the moments that count. And that you do everything you can to make sure that whatever you do, does not lead to the person next to you, or along the road, or over the ocean, having a bad day.

The things we love in our lives that are an indulgence, we should seek out for quality. Our capacity to understand and appreciate art should not be wasted on things that are big, or loud, but not good.

It should instead be used to immerse ourselves in a quest to find our story. The one that has been created with the kind of love that matches the love we need.

If we do this, I believe it leads to a natural reduction in our consumption. I have talked about fragrance, but this can be anything.

We all have things in our lives that we love, and I also think that if we explore ourselves we will realise that it is only a few things.

I am convinced asking what something is for in my life, has helped to eliminate more than I have continued to consume, and to consume in better ways.

If you don’t love it, try to never ever do it, or buy it, again.

It is liberating.