Technology Promises the Comfort of Connection Without the Demands Of Intimacy
It’s easy to be your friend when you don’t expect anything but a clap, comment or emoji ~Author
A story about the real cost of intimacy.
To look into the eyes of another person and share your soul will cost you something.
You cannot be intimate with someone you don’t spend time with.
Texting, sending casual emojis, and leaving praying hands does not build intimacy.
I know we are in the digital age, and I recognize that some things render a short response.
However, to communicate effectively, it takes time, attentiveness, and a willingness to put the other person’s needs above your own.
The digital age has made it convenient for those who already lack communication skills to become more introverted.
I’m not one to blame technology.
We must learn to govern ourselves, and for those who have children, we must model healthy communication skills and assist our children in acquiring them.
When you engage in something, you bring a part of yourself into the equation.
Human beings are social creatures.
We enjoy interacting on some level.
Even if you are an introvert, you still want some companionship or closeness with a person or an animal a face-to-face interaction.
I recently heard a commentator say that people in this current generation are the loneliest generation they observed in decades.
I see so many people rely on their phones and other social media connections to fulfill them socially.
Traditionally, these needs were met through face-to-face interactions, forging deep, complex bonds known as intimacy.
However, the rise of technology has introduced a new kind of connection, one that promises comfort and ease while subtly eroding the very foundations of intimacy.
Technology offers a constant stream of connection — a never-ending loop of likes, comments, and messages.
Are the social media connections real?
Is there true intimacy on social media platforms?
Social media platforms, messaging apps, and online communities create the illusion of closeness without the vulnerability and commitment required for real intimacy.
Are you building a relationship with a random person who likes your post?
Do you spend time with the person who sent you a friend request?
We curate online personas, projecting the most polished versions of ourselves — a far cry from the messy complexities that true intimacy demands.
True intimacy requires revealing who you are, which is what makes it intimate.
One of the key appeals of this technological connection is the absence of pressure.
Unlike in-person interactions, online connections allow us to choose the level of engagement.
There is no work required for scheduling a post or commenting on something you like.
We can lurk on the fringes of a conversation, dipping in and out as we please.
We can craft witty replies at our leisure, avoiding the awkward silences and fumbled conversations that can characterize real-life interactions.
This curated control promotes a sense of comfort and a safe space where we can connect on our terms.
Furthermore, technology offers a seemingly limitless pool of potential connections.
With a few clicks, we can join groups dedicated to our most niche interests, connect with people across geographical boundaries, and find communities that cater to our specific needs.
When we hide behind our devices, what are we gaining?
I purposely turn off notifications after a certain time.
I interact with my colleagues when we are working from home via teams to improve the workplace environment.
This abundance creates a sense of security.
If one connection fizzles out, countless others are readily available.
The fear of rejection, a significant barrier to intimacy, seems to diminish in the vast online landscape.
No one has all the answers on how to address our reliance on digital devices.
What are you going to do if there is a blackout or cell towers are down?
It has happened and can happen again.
Instead of creating this illusion in the digital world, why not make an in-person group that meets up once a week?
Yes, I’m optimistic, but I also realize that there are so many hurting, lonely people.
Intimacy thrives on shared experiences, both positive and negative.
It requires us to be seen, not just our carefully constructed online persona.
Start with one thing in the digital space that you can decrease and add one thing in the natural that you enjoy socially.
There are ways to learn how to be present with others, both online and offline.
Technology has given us so many great advances, but it has also stunted our growth in other ways.
However, we must strive to be mindful users, recognizing the limitations of online interaction and actively pursuing real-life intimacy.
This means making time for face-to-face interactions, promoting deeper conversations, and engaging in activities that build trust and understanding.
Technology can be a bridge, connecting us with people who share our interests or live far away.
However, true intimacy requires us to step off the bridge and onto common ground, where we can be vulnerable, share our true selves, and build connections that extend beyond the superficial.
We must resist the temptation to settle for the easy comfort of likes and followers and instead seek out the richer, more challenging rewards of true intimacy.
I believe technology has fundamentally changed the way we connect.
While it offers a seemingly easy path to connection, it ultimately undermines the vulnerability, commitment, and empathy that are essential for intimacy.
Let’s recognize the limitations and build a bridge to one another by actively pursuing real-life connections.
Thank you for reading.
Be Well!
