Fucked Love, Passionate Hate
My first love turned into such intense hate…it was a lesson.
I was 16…
He was my first boyfriend, the hottest smartest guy in class. It all felt natural, but now that I look at it…it was mostly orchestrated by friends and social circle. You know how you unwittingly end up in a relationship, especially in college.
Yep, that's exactly what it was.
The only problem is, I didn't know it at that time.
16 year old me thought this is it, my one true love. I am snickering as I type this, I literally gave my blood, sweat, and tears to that fucked love.
Wow, what a gigantic fool I was!!
But I blame it all on society, mental conditioning, and overall peer pressure (or maybe my constant need for validation, and feeling the fucking moronic need to have a boyfriend to feel worthwhile…ugh, my old self repulses me now, what a loser! Maybe I should be kinder…naïve is better than loser).
I was the ideal girlfriend, and the first few months were dreamy. Our friends gushed and the entire group was buzzing with our romance. He seemed perfect, he was handsome, brooding, and intense. Sadly I was completely clueless about what the brooding really was.
