I Laugh At These Silly Men
Men, step up and get your booty
The Spanish Inquisition one bit of advice to all the single men out there, trying to score on Tinder or Bumbly, step up your game!
Not like the game-playing and deceiving women, but like being a better man.
Why? Because the chicks will beat a path to your door and you will be swimming in hot kitty.
Mrs. The Spanish Inquisition knows so many friends that are single women with good jobs, have their own places, and generally have their life together. The one big lacking thing in their life is lack of companionship. I get it, they’d like to have someone to spend time with, do fun things, and get some sexy time.
I listen to their complaints and being married for a long time, I know that they might NOT want me to fix their problem (Mr. TSI is a good fixer) but just listen.
So I listened and have learned!
And here are my thoughts on how The Spanish Inquisition can make this a win-win situation for lonely women and horny men.
Rule #1 — Women, don’t change. Keep doing what you’re doing. Be hot, be yourself, shave or not shave, be happy in your skin, and keep sussing out the losers.
Rule #2 — Men, be better. If you think of her pleasure and focus on her orgasms, then you will have her twirling around like Mary Poppins. She’ll be cooking you food, taking care of you, and rubbing her pussy all over you. (#winning)
Rule #69 — Fucky fuck all the time. O’ yourself to bliss. Have crazy sex, make the kids slam their doors closed, jizz, breed, buttsex, eat pussy, blowjobs, or whatever floats your boat. Do it and do a lot of it. Then make tea, coffee, or a light snack that you can share in bed.
The sad fact is that many men don’t want to change, they feel that they’re owed sex because they’re a man and they get to treat women like crap afterward. These are silly men, they are missing the point completely.
A healthy relationship is like plowing a fertile field. It’s hard work at first but then as you keep plowing the same field over and over again, you might know where the underground springs are, what wheat grows best, or even where the rich compost is.
A smart man will learn these lessons and be a better plower, planting his seeds into so many happy fields, that his wheat will grow strong and plentiful.
So men, step up. Be better. There are so many awesome women out there waiting for a better man. Mrs. Spanish Inquisition finds them all for me to help them with their farming work and I’m here for you.
I was once a famous writer in my own mind, now I’m just a Medium writer. You should follow me.
