Silent Treatment | Philosophy
Impact of the Silent Treatment in Relationships
A Destructive Form of Passive-Aggression & Emotional Abuse
One day John met Sarah at the book shop. Both found each other attractive. John found that Sarah had a similar interest to him. They both went for a coffee and talked nonstop for 3 hours.
They exchanged their number and the next day they talked a lot on a similar subject for more than 3 hours. The days kept going and their attraction for each other kept increasing. Both found themselves entangled in each other’s subconscious. They fell in love and had lots of dates together.
But one day suddenly Sarah stopped replying John regarded the fact that everything was going perfectly fine from both sides. John tried to call her 3 times a day but Sarah did not answer his single call. The last words she said were,
“I do not want to talk to you again”.
Before this incident, they just had a minor disagreement but she did not try to address this with him on that day. She kept this hiding from him. Even he was not aware much about this disagreement that it would become the reason behind her silent treatment.
The girl who used to call and text her 10 times a day has suddenly stopped talking, answering, and replying to him for no reason.
Then John never tried to approach her back because he felt respectful when she rudely did not answer him provided the fact there was no fault from his side.
Their minor disagreement has slowly transformed into major silence. As time passed by their charm and desire for each other decreased. Both become busy in their life.
They were not aware of the fact that such silent treatment that John was not deserving and expecting has been transformed into a destructive force that can even erode the strongest bonds.
When John confronts her that there is no need to give him the silent treatment and this is a form of emotional abuse. She openly breaks up with him even after understanding the entire situation. She willfully let him go.
You must have experienced a similar situation in your life where your partner just does not want to talk to you over a minor disagreement. Silent treatment acts like a silent weapon that a manipulator uses to manipulate you with its insidious nature of passive-aggression.
It makes you think about your own sanity. You always question yourself and what you did wrong. The worst part is your partner does not even want to resolve the argument.
It’s a tool that forms deep emotional and traumatic wounds that leave no physical scars. It can leave you in isolation, insecurity, uncertainty, depression, and emotional stress for no reason.
Silent treatment is a part of emotional abuse and has destroyed many relationships. It can also disturb the chemistry, trust, and understanding between the partners.
In a true relationship where partners trust each other, communication is the key but silent treatment works opposite to it. In this situation, your partner just does not want to listen to your side of the story.
In Sarah and John’s case, Silent treatment seeded doubts and insecurity and nobody was aware of where their relationship was shaping. It has destroyed their mental peace. Their self-esteem when down. Nobody wanted to break the silence because their ego was stopping them from doing so.
This was the end of their story that initiated with a minor disagreement but transformed into a bigger argument and nobody tried to resolve it because their ego was bigger than their love.
Research has found that silent treatment hinders personal growth and limits our ability to build a meaningful relationship. Many people made giving their partner a silent treatment a habit.
Some partners use giving the silent treatment as a game, tool, and way to manipulate their partner so that they can create some drama out of it.
Some partners weaponize their silence just to shut down another mouth. This is the most destructive nature of silent treatment where there is no punishment for their powerful abuse.
Sometimes, you want to create drama out of nothing so that you can initiate the argument. By doing so, you can win the argument but you will lose the person.
-Som Dutt
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