The Joys of Pen and Paper: Signing Off

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5 min readOct 20, 2020

When long distances keep us apart from one another, we naturally turn to texting, video calls and emails to get in touch. But, what if we try for something different, something more old school and traditional? In this final part of this series on The Joys of Pen and Paper, we look at letter-writing and the potential of lifelong friendships through pen pals. (Read Parts 1, 2 & 3)

Dear Reader,

What are some of the ways you stay in touch with friends and loved ones?

Before I had my own mobile phone, my means of connecting with people were meeting them in-person, calling them on their home phone, passing notes in class and sending letters by snail mail. It’s a far cry from these days where Internet access, mobile phones, and smart devices and wearables are ubiquitous, and almost everything you need to get in touch with someone are simply at your fingertips.

The Pleasure of Communication

One of the pleasures of communication is taking time to be in the presence of another person, whether it’s physically or digitally as is the case with video calls. But either way, we may be unable to give the other person our undivided attention when there’s a constant stream of incoming emails, texts and notifications bombarding us.

When it comes to writing a letter, it’s just you with the pen and paper laid out before you. In the article ‘The Fading Art of Letter Writing’, written for The New York Times, journalist Catherine Field muses over our generation’s relationship with letter-writing. In the letters written by her mother-in-law, there are no emojis, smileys, jarring endings. Each letter that arrives was carefully written on ‘simple, crisp white paper’ that she took the time to sit down and savour each word as she read.

“A good handwritten letter is a creative act, and not just because it is a visual and tactile pleasure. It is a deliberate act of exposure, a form of vulnerability, because handwriting opens a window on the soul in a way that cyber communication can never do. You savour their arrival and later take care to place them in a box for safe keeping.” — Catherine Field

Old postcards, letters and envelopes. [Image source: Giselle Lim]

Unlike the older generation who have decades of experience with the analogue age, I grew up in the middle of the digital revolution. In the span of a few years, I went from signing off letters to logging off from video calls.

Yet, one of my most precious belongings is a metal tin that safely stores old letters and postcards I’ve received over the years. I treasure these pieces of written correspondence, and revisiting the contents of this tin brings me back to the good memories of simpler times.

No secret love letters were hidden away in my metal tin! [Image source: GIPHY — Lara Jean Covey’s letters from *To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before*]

Becoming Pals Through Pen and Paper

But what if you’re getting to know someone you’ve never met before?

Even though it is becoming less common nowadays, writing to pen pals is one way to forge new friendships. And if you’re fortunate enough, your pen pal could even become a lifelong friend!

In a heart-warming story shared by Michelle Mouhtis, a 27 year-old, she traces a 13-year friendship with her pen pal. As part of a class, Michelle’s teacher helped match her with pen pals from around the world. Through this, Michelle gained a friend in Rachel. Despite having never met before, it didn’t take long for them to open up to one another and share all about their lives.

Open up your heart and write a love letter to a loved one. They’ll appreciate it! [Image source: GIPHY]

Initially strangers from opposite ends of the world, Michelle and Rachel grew to become the best of friends. Sharing the reasons why she continues to write letters, Michelle explained:

“Sure, it’s incredibly convenient to be able to talk to someone the moment we want to, and share photos and FaceTime as things are happening with friends and family around the world. But we are losing the personal touch. The quality of the time it takes to put into a friendship.”

Writing and receiving letters is something most of us aren’t used to or have lost touch with, but that doesn’t mean that we can’t give it a try. If you’re interested in finding a pen pal, online services such as: InterPals, PenPal World and Postcrossing can help you match up with people from all around the world.

Preserved with Pen and Paper

We tend to hold onto mementoes and memories from the relationships we cherish the most for sentimental reasons. Letters, especially, make such memories tangible to have and to hold long after they’ve been written and read.

Safely stored away from prying eyes, letters are the most private correspondence you can have with another person, and handwritten letters crafted by a loved one or pen pal are one of their kind and irreplaceable. Sending a letter can be like giving away a part of yourself — there’s no taking it back, and you have to trust the other person enough to be pouring out your heart and soul to them.

And sometimes, that can be a wonderful thing.

You can find eBooks about letter-writing on the NLB Mobile app. Here are a few to inspire you: