7 Painful Truths That Changed My Life
3. The length of a relationship doesn’t mean it’s working
I used to think that the world was black and white. There were right things and wrong things, good people and bad people, and winners and losers.
If I just followed the rules and did what I was supposed to do, then I would be a winner too.
I was so sure of myself…until life showed me that it’s not that simple.
It turns out there are a lot of truths in the world that are painful to learn, but we have to learn them if we want to grow.
Here are 7 of those truths that changed my life forever:
1. Success requires 5% brain and 95% consistency
I was recently talking to a friend about what it takes to be successful in life.
We both agreed that there are certain truths that you have to come to grips with in order to achieve success.
One of those truths is that success requires 10% brain and 90% consistency. In other words, you have to be smart about the choices you make and be consistent in your actions in order to achieve your goals.
This truth really resonated with me because I realized that I had been inconsistent in my own life.
I would start projects but never see them through to completion. I would make plans but never follow through with them.
But once I realized that success requires consistency, I started changing my habits.
I became more focused and disciplined in my actions. And as a result, I started seeing better results in my life.
If you want to be successful in life, you have to accept this truth and start being more consistent in your own life.
It won’t happen overnight, but if you stay the course, you will eventually achieve the success you’re after.
2. Someone’s dangerous flaw is his lack of self-awareness
I never realized how much of my life was spent in self-denial until I started reading about psychology.
It seems like every day, I would find another article or blog post about the importance of self-awareness, and how lacking it can be detrimental to both our personal and professional lives.
The more I read, the more I realized that I had been living in a state of denial for years.
I wasn’t aware of my own flaws, and as a result, I was constantly making the same mistakes over and over again.
Once I started to become more self-aware, however, my life began to change.
I was able to identify my weaknesses and work on them. As a result, I became more successful both personally and professionally.
And while it hasn’t been easy, slowly but surely, I’m starting to become the person I always wanted to be.
If you are struggling with self-awareness, start by taking an honest look at yourself.
Examine your strengths and weaknesses, and try to understand why you act the way you do.
Once you gain a better understanding of yourself, it will be easier for you to make positive changes in your life.
No one ever achieved success without making mistakes
I think many people have this misconception that successful people never make mistakes.
That they are always right and always know what to do. Unfortunately, this isn’t the case at all.
Everyone makes mistakes, no matter how smart or talented they are.
The only difference between successful people and unsuccessful people is that successful people learn from their mistakes and don’t give up when things get tough.
3. The length of a relationship doesn’t mean it’s working
I used to believe that the length of a relationship was the best indicator of its success.
If two people could stay together for years, or even decades, then surely they must be doing something right.
However, I came to realize that this wasn’t always the case.
Just because a couple had been together for a long time didn’t mean that their relationship was healthy or happy.
In fact, in some cases, it was just the opposite.
Three years ago, I was in a long-term relationship that simply wasn’t working.
We were always fighting, and I was constantly unhappy. But for some reason, I just couldn’t walk away.
I told myself that things would get better and that we had already come so far.
So I stayed even though every fiber of my being was telling me to leave.
I realized that just because two people had been together for a long time didn’t mean that their relationship was working.
This was a major life-changing realization for me and it completely changed the way I looked at relationships.
If you’re in a long-term relationship, don’t assume that it’s automatically successful just because of its length.
Instead, take a closer look at how you and your partner are really feeling.
Are you both happy?
Do you feel like you’re being treated with respect? These are the things that really matter in a relationship — not just how long it’s been going on.
4. You lose self-respect when you are looking for external validation
I didn’t always believe that looking for external validation was a sign of a lack of self-respect.
In fact, for most of my life, I thought it was perfectly normal to seek approval from others.
It wasn’t until recently that I realized the truth: when you’re looking for someone else to validate your choices, you’re giving away your power.
And that’s not something I’m willing to do anymore. Now, I make decisions based on what feels right for me, regardless of what other people might think.
And you know what? It feels pretty darn good. If you’re still seeking approval from others, I encourage you to consider making a change.
Trust me, your life will thank you for it.
5. Prioritize self-love over the love of others for you
One of the most important truths I learned is that we can’t control how others feel about us.
No matter how hard we try, we can’t make someone else love us if they don’t want to.
This was a hard pill to swallow, but it was also a liberating realization. It helped me to stop chasing after people who didn’t want me and to start focusing on those who did.
Something else I realized is that even if someone does love us, that doesn’t mean they will always be there for us.
People have their own lives and their own problems to deal with, and they can’t always be available when we need them.
This doesn’t mean they don’t care about us, but it does mean that we need to learn to rely on ourselves first and foremost.
Finally, I learned that self-love is the most important kind of love there is.
If we don’t love ourselves, no one else will be able to truly make us happy. We need to fill our own cup first before we can hope to share our love with others.
Learning these truths has been a process, but it has made a world of difference in my life.
I am now happier and more fulfilled than I ever thought possible, and I am finally able to give and receive the kind of love I deserve.
If you are struggling with similar issues, I hope these truths will help you as much as they have helped me.
6. Your fight is not against the world but against yourself
I used to see the world as my enemy.
I was always fighting against something — my parents, my teachers, and my classmates.
It felt like no matter what I did, I was always on the losing side. But then I came across a powerful truth that changed everything: your fight is not against the world but against yourself.
This truth completely shifted my perspective.
I realized that all the battles I was fighting were actually within myself. I was the one holding myself back, and no one else could control my destiny.
Once I started to work on myself, everything changed. My relationships improved, my grades went up, and I became much happier overall.
If you’re struggling in life, know that your fight is not against the world but against yourself.
Only you can hold yourself back from greatness. But once you realize this truth, you have the power to change your life for the better.
7. Nothing is expensive until it costs you your mental health
I used to think that money was the most important thing in life.
I would work long hours at my job, even if I didn’t enjoy it, because I wanted to make as much money as possible.
I was always chasing after the next raise or promotion, and I thought that if I could just earn a little bit more, I would be happy.
But then I realized that nothing is expensive until it costs you your mental health.
I stopped working so hard and started focusing on enjoying my life more. And you know what?
I found that I was actually happier with less money. Now, I’m not saying that money isn’t important.
But when it starts to cost you your mental health, it’s time to reassess your priorities.
So if you’re finding that your work is starting to take a toll on your mental health, maybe it’s time to take a step back and reassess your priorities.
Life is too short to spend chasing after things that don’t make you happy.
Conclusion
If there’s one thing we can all agree on, it’s that life is full of truths.
And while some truths are difficult to accept, they can often be the catalyst for positive change.
For example, the truth that success requires hard work and consistency is a difficult pill to swallow.
But once we accept this truth, we can begin to take the necessary steps to achieve our goals.
Similarly, the truth that we are often our own worst enemies can be painful to face.
But by recognizing our flaws and taking steps to correct them, we can begin to build a healthier relationship with ourselves.
Ultimately, these truths can help us lead happier, more fulfilling lives.
So next time you’re faced with a difficult truth, don’t shy away from it. Embrace it, and use it as an opportunity to grow.
Want to read more of my stories and gain unlimited access to other great stories on Medium? Consider joining Medium through my referral link for just $5/month. Your monthly payment will support me directly. Sign up here to get my articles whenever I publish.
