How to deal with rejection
How do you deal with the feeling of being told: “you are not good enough?”
It doesn’t matter if it is a job, relationship, education, or contract. The feeling that comes with someone closing the door in your face is the same.
From worthlessness to hopelessness, diminished self-confidence and the eventual realization that someone else was more preferred than you. The feeling does hurt, and it can hurt so much, that if you are not on your guard, may lead to unthinkable sadness and loneliness.
I have also had to deal with rejection at several stages of my life and I must say those periods really suck. But here is the deal. I got to learn that when people tell you they prefer others to you, it’s their loss and not yours. You know why? It’s because if you are true to yourself, you should know your worth and celebrate your own uniqueness.
Truth be told, sometimes when people tell us we are not good enough for a particular job or relationship status, it’s possible that we may have some flaws that need to be addressed. In essence, I mean that we may actually be in need of an upgrade- more education, training, certifications, character or personality adjustments.
However, when people deliberately try to bring you down for no just reason, try not to take it personally. See it as a weakness of theirs, dust it off your clothes and move on with your life.
After allowing other people’s perceptions of my abilities get to me and dampen my self-confidence, I learned to stop taking things personally. Even while working, I quickly got accustomed to how some superiors lacked communication skills. Because rather than communicate a perceived flaw in your abilities in a professional and moral manner, some people just go all out to become mean.
I realized that such people have a goal in mind and it is to make you lose faith in your abilities and prevent you from trying to be the best that you are and are capable of becoming.
Also, such people may see you as a threat to them-both professionally, financially or personally and the only way they think they can stop you is by trying to be hurtful in the way they communicate their disapproval of you or your efforts.
It doesn’t matter if you have tried so hard to put in your best in trying to make that relationship, job search, career or job work, if someone deliberately decides to close the door on you for no just reason, always know that there are others out there that will open up. And remember that, someone’s inability to see your worth, is their loss, not yours!
Evi Abada, MD, MS, is a Resident Physician in Pathology with a Masters in International Health Policy and Management and writes about life, global health, cancer prevention, diagnosis, and treatment.
