One And a Half Reasons Committing Suicide is Not an Option.

Onwe Chinasa
Published in
6 min readJun 21, 2019

“Man is born free, but he is everywhere in chains,” Jean-Jacques Rousseau.

A lot of times, people use the challenges and other inconvenient jabs that life throws at humanity as an excuse to commit suicide.

The truth is, no one said anybody deserves whatever adverse conditions to their desires and aspirations. No one deserves to go to jail for an offense they didn’t commit. No woman deserves abuse in a relationship or marriage. No child deserves to be abandoned in the street by parents whom he/she didn’t beg to bring them to the world. Yes! No one deserves any awful or unpleasant thing happening to them. It is unfair for anyone to suffer from any type of chronic disease or ailments. It is also unjust for you to lose that opportunity after putting in your all into it. That guy or lady has no “right” to reject your proposal, not at all. How and why should that marriage fail after you have given it your all? I entirely agree with you; you don’t deserve anything less than success and a good life in your endeavors. You deserve to be respected and loved just the way you would like it.

But! Here is another truth;

“Life sucks and most people suck, if you wake up one day and everyone loves you, and the weather is beautiful with everything working hundred percent according to your wishes and desires, it simply means you’re dead.”

As funny as the above statement might be, it has lots of truth in it. Nothing is ever a hundred percent perfect. People often believe they are not perfect, but they expect other things and other people to be perfect. Just like the idea of the French philosopher Jean-Jacques Rousseau, “man is born free, but he is everywhere in chains.” We are generally born beautiful creatures, and then “society” happens to us. We run into parents, teachers, and religious leaders, friends, enemies, and people, all of whom have the potential to make us feel unworthy and defective. They come with different expectations, rules, ideas, and all the pieces of baggage that often have nothing to with our personal goals. We give up our lives to please them all, and we decay and then die inside.

Let Go Whatever That’s Making You Feel Miserable.

It’s high time you took your life back. Give up the experience that is trying to kill you and start living your authentic life. Like Susan Blauner, the author of How I Stayed Alive When My Brain Was Trying to Kill Me: One Person’s Guide to Suicide Prevention explained,“if something is killing you — your job, marriage, or anything else — eliminate it from your life.” You need to understand that you won’t be doing yourself any good by taking your life. Yes, you may escape the pains you are currently passing through right now, but have you thought about life after death? Do you think nothing goes on, on the other side after death? Think again! A lot goes on there. I may not have a proof for that, but I know that had it been nothing goes on there so many people who died would have found a way to return to the earth.

It is also very accurate to say that life is not fair, but it is also at our disposal to make something out of it. Life is for you to live and not the other way round. Make no mistake about it; I understand that feeling of considering living difficult and dying easier. I think this is feasibly one of the reasons so many young people consider suicide as their treatment of choice these days. Things are not supposed to be so, and there is entirely no reason to kill yourself. Like the Valyrians in the Game Of Thrones series would say it, “Valar morghulis; all men must die.” If it is true that all men must die, that will bring us to the number 1 reason committing suicide should never be an option.

1. Valar Morghulis; all men must die.

I don’t know about anyone else, but my favorite episode in the just concluded series finale of the game of throne was the third episode, “the long night.” I didn’t just watch it. I followed it with every emotion. I lost hope when they lost hope. I was afraid when they were all afraid. I cried when they were reasons to cry. I imagined it to be a real-life scenario, and I followed it through. I imagined it being those points when I got to my wits end in life. I saw a people who were face to face with a situation without hope of seeing the next day. They faced death, and they were meant to fight with death and the dead. While those Dothraki soldiers lined up being afraid but so determined to die fighting instead of just killing themselves by their own hands, the red woman came and reminded them that “valar morghulis.” That a kind of rekindled hopes in them.

Therefore, are you in that kind of situation where there is no reason to live anymore? I say to you, valar morghulis! And since we all must die, what’s the rush in trying to exit earlier than the rest of us by taking your own life? Give it a little time, my friend. Fight just some more even if that situation will defeat or kill you, let it not be by your own hands. By the way, why would you want to kill yourself since you already know you will still die after all? I want you to note this one thing from this article even if there is nothing else you would take,

your situation is not the worst; there are people with worst cases than yours.

If you are better off than so many other people in the world, I ask again, what is the rush in trying to end it by yourself? You may not believe that time changes all things, remember that the difference between yesterday and today is time. Time changed yesterday to today, and it will keep changing things. It can as well change that your predicament or tough life to a blessing in the end. If you have accepted to give it one more long night, let’s look at the half reason you should never consider suicide.

2. Valar Dohaeris; “all men must serve.

I intentionally named this section a half reason why you should never consider taking your own life. I agree we all must serve other people other than ourselves. People kill themselves because they go beyond their limits to impress other people. That’s the point where helping other people becomes toxic. Service should never be the reason you would want to end your life. Helping others — spouses, parents, friends, family, even strangers- should be something you do because they make you feel good. Once you are no longer feeling good about carrying out any task at all, please, give yourself a break, if not quit.

It is true, we must be responsible for the people we care about each time, but we need to operate within our limits. Discover the limit you can go each time or season and maintain it. Don’t kill yourself for anyone because when you die, life moves on.

Leave me alone to end it, you say? Let me ask you, after taking your life what next? Would you have saved yourself? No way! You would have ended up losing your life and leaving shame and more troubles for your loved ones. Has everybody offended you? I know there is just one person that you care so much about. That is the person you would leave the shame and frustration after you commit suicide.

When you kill yourself, you kill all the people who care about you, and you leave so many other destinies attached to yours wounded and confused.

Even if the whole world is against you, for the sake of that one person who cared about you and whom you care about, give it just one more long night. I tell you this one more night can change it all for you. The following morning might just come with the courage you may need to exceed any expectation related to your challenges and help you heal physically and psychologically.

May peace be with you!!!

These are my musings on the just concluded Game of Thrones series.