Peanut butter

I grew up in a simpler time.

We all loved peanut butter.

We bought it at the regular grocery store for forty -five cents.

It came in an eight-ounce jar.

The top was easily removed with a slight twist.

The peanut butter was right there.

No further barriers prevented you from your nut butter.

The aroma was enticingly overpowering.

The consistency was creamy smooth unless you wanted the kind with chopped peanuts.

All you did was decide where to spread it.

Usually on puffy bleached bread. (But that is another story.)

It was a delightful and simple time.

We did not speculate on harmful chemicals that might go in our bodies from peanut butter.

Now we go to the pricy, specialty store.

There is an entire aisle designated for nut butter.

Almond: With nut and salt. Creamy with salt.

No salt with nut. No salt, creamy.

Peanut: With nut and salt. Creamy with salt.

No nut, no salt. Creamy, no salt.

Cashew. Salt, no nut, Salt nut chips.

No salt, with nut. No salt, creamy.

You have to read the label with such care.

It is easy to grab the wrong nut butter.

Then you pay the high price.

Amazon advertises Peter Pan creamy peanut butter, sixteen ounces for $239. Did they miss a decimal?

At Trader Joes the sixteen ounce creamy, unsalted, almond butter is $14.85.

Now try to open the jar or container.

If you can get the plastic lid off then you face a barrier that would stop even the Roman army.

Sealed to the top of the jar holding your nut butter captive is a plastic gooey aluminum padlock.

A barrier I do not expect would yield to a hammer and chisel.

If you get the butter blocker off you face the next challenge.

At least an inch of oil floats on top and blocks you from your nut butter.

I have never known what to do with the oil.

If you pour off the oil you can get to the butter underneath. As you progress through the jar the butter clogs in crumbles. The crumbles are a non-spreadable mess as you approach the bottom of the jar.

If you try to stir it in you get a sloppy uneven slush. It goes everywhere. There is no keeping the slop in the jar.

Sloppy slippery oily goo goes all over the sides of the jar making them slippery. Your countertop and floor are subject to attack.

There is probably a pricey online class to educate me on opening a nut butter jar. I have not found it yet.

Lately, I rotate the jar. Stand it on its head and then on the bottom.

If boredom sets in I can roll the jar around the kitchen.

I have not been successful shaking nut butter.

But to be honest I have not tried a paint shaker.

Could they could install them in nut butter section at stores.

Like coffee grinders.

The nut butter is never mixed creamy smooth like the peanut butter of my youth.

Still. We seek the healthy nut butter despite the frustration.