This Is The Reason Why You Won’t Score That Second Date.
Single Guys have a lot of problems. I know because I’m one of them. I’ve been running in the single guy lane for 34 years and can attest to the issues that plague us. But out of all of the issues we struggle with there is one that seems to always be obvious to those around us while we are still oblivious to. What is it? The follow through. Single guys suck at the follow-through in a lot of things in life. It’s the reason why we can’t get a second date.
The Follow Through
When you think about it, the follow through is extremely important in just about any sport. If you are even half-way good at sports you know the importance of a good follow-through. In basketball, if you stop your shot midway, is it ever going to make it to the basket? Probably not. You’ve got to follow through.
If you play soccer and stop your foot parallel to the other, is it going to go very far? Nope. If you play tennis, golf, baseball — anything where a swing is involved if you only go half way, is the ball going to get anywhere? No way. You’ve got to follow through.
Learning the Follow Through In Relationships
Learning to master the follow through is key in any sport. Allow me to humor you with a dumb, rhetorical question, then. If following through in sports is important, how much more is it in our relationships?
Think about it for a second. What could our lives look like if we took all the lessons we know about follow through in sports and apply them to our relationships? It would be a game changer. But the problem still remains — you and I suck at following through when it comes to relationships.
I Sucked at Following Through
I’m going to throw myself under the bus for a moment. A few years back I went on a few mildly successful dates with a girl. I was struggling with what to do next as I wasn’t sure where it would go. I decided to come up with an exit strategy of how I would get out of this relationships if things didn’t go the way I hoped they would on date #3.
Date #3 happened and it went exactly as I thought it would. It was boring at best and I knew I needed to end the pursuit of this relationship. Boom. Pow. Implement exit strategy and move on. Feel free to laugh, but you might find yourself doing the same thing. So, what happened next?
I didn’t do anything. Literally. Nothing — I never followed through. Did I keep dating the girl? Nope. So, what did I do? Nothing. Guys — I did nothing. I didn’t call, text, talk to her about how I felt.
I. Did. Nothing.
I was such a jerk. It was a total “bro” move and I regret it to this day. I lacked the ability to follow through. I know I am not the only one with this problem. We do this all the time in all sorts of relationships.
Sometimes this happens with girls on dates. It will show up with friends when we don’t commit or follow through or show up to something. It will even appear at work. We’ll drop the ball on a project and never finish the job. We let it go and assume it doesn’t affect anything.
This problem with our follow-through exacerbates itself when it happens in the most important relationship you and I can have on this planet: Our relationship with God. God is always moving and calling us to do incredible things in this life and we often don’t follow through with his call.
How do we go about fixing the follow through?
Like any major problem we face in life, we need to begin with awareness. We must become aware of our issues in following through and committing to others. You are checking this off the list right now by reading this post. Our problem with following through comes in all shapes and sizes. Becoming aware of where we are at individually is the first step in getting it right.
It is from our individual awareness where we can begin making strides into the rest our lives. Your tendency will be to think big at first, and that’s fine. If you can make the leap, go for it. But, I would advise you to begin small. This is where the quick wins and early successes are. Build consistency in the small before anything else.
Start Small & Be Consistent
What do I mean by beginning small? Start with places in your life that require small follow through and be consistent with them. The small places are showing up when you say you are going to show up. Returning phone calls. Answering e-mails. It’s about building faithfulness in the small places first. When you can learn to follow through in those areas, it will make the larger follow through much easier.
From my own experience and the wisdom of others, when you can learn to become faithful in the small and follow through, you will understand much quicker your issues with following through. You’ll discover the root of your follow through problem much faster.
Your problem may begin with you simply not wanting to follow-through. Ok. It’s a place to start. Maybe you’re afraid to fail. Fear is valid and another great place to begin. No matter the problem, pinpoint it and then use small commitments and stick to them as a way to overcome it.
Here’s Your Follow Through Challenge…
Pick one thing you are terrible at following through on and commit to following through with it for the rest of the week. Make it small. You’ll know what it is. Your only rule is that it must be directed at another person.
Why? Because remember — this whole thing is about relationships. When we can learn to follow through with our stuff, it trickles over to others. When we follow through with others, it helps to form healthy relationships that you and I desperately need. But — the work starts with you. So, go do something today about your follow-through problem.
Do This Right Now…
Download my FREE Guide on How you can make some small and simple tweaks to begin getting better at relationships today. This Guide will help you with your follow-through! Click Here To Get the Guide Now.
