Vanished Creativity
I spent years living without a crucial part of me. Something was missing and I didn’t even realize it had vanished.
I lost my creativity, or at least, it appeared like I did.
While I was engaged in the all-encompassing act of being an adult, I’d put it all aside, believing the thoughts I had, saying it was useless and a waste of time.
Despite my habit to recall bullies at school or the teachers who just didn’t understand or want to get involved when I was a child, there was also an air of joyful creativity surrounding the unpleasantness.
This always somehow lifted me and now softens even the harshest memories.
Since I’m the adult in the room now, I choose to recall the things that made childhood feel magical.
Like how crisp the air felt in the evening hours; the feeling as my feet sank into snow banks on the walk home from school; how bright the stars looked at night and the awe I felt looking at them.
There was the feeling of invincibility, that I could do anything and be anyone. Most of all, there was joy leaping out of my chest without any restrictions to hold it back.
I was moved to express this magic.
Inspired creativity was born in me.
Take a moment and ponder “Where was the magic in my childhood?”
Did it move you to create? Maybe it was painting, drawing, building, imaginative play, inventing some new toy or new ways of using old ones?
Or simply just imagining possibilities.
I’d love for you to share some of your creative joys.
“To be creative means to be in love with life. You can be creative only if you love life enough that you want to enhance its beauty, you want to bring a little more music to it, a little more poetry to it, a little more dance to it.” — Osho
For me, some of the ways I created was through writing poems, journaling and art. These were so therapeutic for me to express myself during the dramatic highs and lows of the childhood and teen years. They can be brutal without an outlet.
Now, life is full of “To Do’s”. Busy thoughts fill my days — when to pay the bills, does family need anything, issues with work, and “why does my back hurt?”, etc.
Bringing creativity back into my life helps me just as much now as it did back then by:
- setting aside precious time for myself to take care of what’s going on inside me
- exploring and clearing up feelings I may find difficult to express otherwise
- keeping in touch with who I really am, at times when who I am doesn’t seem to mesh with the world around me
- staying grounded through really difficult times and allowing me to feel like I can trust myself
- allowing the beauty and the sorrows of life to harmonize the tender spaces within
“Of all the areas where research has been conducted, the most compelling and exciting art therapy data is emerging in the healthcare arena,” says Cathy Malchiodi PhD, in Psychology Today.
There are many more benefits that have been studied. Creativity in general has been lauded as a wellness practice. Art therapy for instance is having great success in helping people with their mental and physical health.
I lost my creativity, or at least, it seemed like I did.
Gratefully, I found it was merely tucked away, waiting for my return. And the best part is that it’s never too late.
Turns out, the more I “grow up”, the more I realize how wise my heart was when I was young enough to set my imagination free.
So, consider allowing the magic of creativity back into your life. It could light up your heart in places you may have forgotten existed.
REMEMBERING
By Lucy Crisetig
In a room of violet, a spirit so free
Chasing unicorns in a land just waiting for me
Here words abound, gentle and light
Eyes that are focused, shining and bright
She did wait patiently, for me to return
A little worn yet wiser, for much I did learn
Our souls blend as one, for time is no more
Remembering this light, my heart knows to soar
Here we write, among the stars
As we wonder if we came, from Venus or Mars
In a room of violet, a spirit so free
Whole and complete, the one waiting was me
