I Stopped Taking My Antidepressants So I Could Orgasm

I thought they were a gift I had to sacrifice for my joy—and I was fine, until I wasn’t

// Malvestida Magazine, Charles and Annie Spratt

A couple of months ago I lost my orgasm.

2018 was the year from hell for me. Looking back, it is a wonder I came through to the other side. I’ve battled with my mental health for years, but due to stigma, I refused to seek help.

I had recently started studying Psychology at the University of Leeds after switching programs from nursing. However, due to clerical errors, my funding for the course was delayed so I was forced to go to university and work full time at the same time. At one point I even got a second job to cover my expenses.

I was fine until I wasn’t.

I went from powering through to being unable to leave the house due to anxiety and daily panic attacks. Simple tasks like; showering, doing the laundry, and cooking were impossible. I stopped seeing friends, stopped going to work, and stopped attending university.

After a few months of battling my pride, I finally went to the doctor who immediately diagnosed me with depression. I started taking 50mg of Sertraline daily. A little later on, I was subsequently diagnosed with BPD (borderline personality disorder) which in short is…