Rocket Science and Blending Families- It’s Basically the Same Thing

Tiffany Simone
Put It To Rest
Published in
2 min readApr 16, 2022
Just another day in paradise.
Photo by nikko macaspac on Unsplash

Send Help.

So, you’ve survived divorce. Drama-filled or friendly, battlefield or walk in the park, it doesn’t matter, divorce is a bitch. Nobody comes out without some wounds.

IT IS for the best, as they say, but your hair is now gray, your skin is dull, and your family is lost in some parallel universe where their reality has been altered.

And it’s all on you now. So, there’s that. You cannot curl up and fall apart.

You must find a way to make it work. And you do. You become a rock star single parent, figuring out how to survive on four hours of sleep and loneliness. You learn the ropes of resale shopping and running late. Eventually, you’ll fall down the rabbit hole that is online dating and fail miserably…until you don’t.

One day the stars will align with the other stars or whatever that’s supposed to mean, pigs will fly, and a golden light will shine down as angels present you with a human that’ll be worthy of your very limited, very precious time.

There are so many different scenarios that could happen after this. Let’s say you connect with “THE person.” I mean like, the partner of all partners.

It’s the real friggin deal.

You won’t want to screw anything up…ever again. Because your parent guilt now lives in extreme overdrive. Happiness has inevitably become tied to your children’s existence. Thus, the meeting of your two families must be epic. You’ll want to perfectly coordinate it to be exciting, yet peaceful…full of laughter and joy. You envision a Hallmark movie, a Lifetime special…there’s some snow falling, and maybe a sparrow on a log outside a cabin where you’ll all sweetly laugh for hours…

Just kidding, you’ll probably go bowling.

Watching money disappear, your instant Brady Bunch style family will awkwardly struggle through the night.

The bowling pins are smashing, crashes echoing throughout the building, giving you a splitting headache, which is right on par with your sanity slipping away from you.

Send help.

This is just the beginning.

Tiffany Simone

For more of my writing, shop my poetry books on Amazon.

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Tiffany Simone
Put It To Rest

Too much coffee with too many kids. Modern day Brady Bunch. The unfiltered writing of hot mess mom. Buckle up.🦋