Something Bigger: A Mindset of Shared Purpose
Building community by empowering others, breaking down barriers, and having empathy.
Last year, I watched The Farewell, a film that follows 30-year old Billi, who goes to China to bid a quiet farewell to her grandmother, a lovely old woman who is unaware she’s dying because her family decided to adopt the burden of the painful truth. The concept that the family adopted the responsibility of the individual because they understood that they were part of something bigger was meaningful. It was also deeply affecting, because until recently, I feared not being able to find that ‘something bigger’ to commit myself to.
This past year has eased that fear as I realized two truths. One, I realized that I have to lead my life with purpose. Two, my community — the one I engage with, work with, and live in — is not only essential in helping me achieve my purpose, but it is that ‘something bigger,’ and what I should really be seeking is to adopt and achieve a shared purpose.
Ideally, we should be in a ‘share and receive’ relationship with our community. In reality, ‘it’s complicated’ is probably a more appropriate description when we look at our world today. We see individuals who are empowered to represent their people act on behalf of themselves and get rewarded for it. Individuals battling over opinions on Twitter, high-profile Ponzi schemes, and micro-influencer culture all seem to promote prioritization of the self over the greater good. In a sense, we’ve been traumatized by this cognitive dissonance, and that has caused far too many people to adopt a mindset of apathy. And that’s the root of the problem.
So let’s think about how we can reconcile our individual value with the community at large:
1. Understand that by empowering those around you with the tools, resources, and words at your disposal, you empower yourself as well.
I heard this question recently, ‘do you feel empowered?’ And the truth is, I don’t think it’s possible to feel that way until you achieve two things. First — Recognize your skills and what you’re interested in. Second — put that to action. Your impact empowers others in your community: perhaps enabling them to live easier, work more efficiently, think more productively.
For example, I volunteer at an organization that allows me to leverage some of my skills (analyzing, investigating, project management) to advocate for kids and help provide them a safe environment. Your skills, your interests, and even your community can vary — and it’s okay to be different! One of my friends loves developing websites and cares about animals, and in turn she became a webmaster for a local animal shelter, doing her part to live beyond herself.
It doesn’t matter what you do, so long as you do something. Actions > Armchairs. It isn’t enough to talk about problems. It isn’t enough to complain. You have to get involved in what you believe in. The Time Person of the Year, Greta Thunberg, got involved by protesting in front of the Swedish Parliament to advocate for action on climate change. Her voice and her actions empowered others to speak up, and the Greta effect has prompted a worldwide call to action.
2. Break down barriers and seek out common ground.
It’s human to seek uniqueness, to want to be different and stand out in a sea of sameness of smartphone wielding modern animals. But it’s important to not label yourself to the point of isolating yourself from others and preventing any growth. Growth doesn’t happen in isolation — growth occurs from actions and reactions, trial and error, in the interactions we have with the environment we live in.
To that end, we need to work on breaking down barriers, driving open conversations and listening to each other. Too often, we distance ourselves from the opposition… But how does that help get anything done? We need to have those conversations to reconcile the different viewpoints, and come to a common ground to work off of.
Sometimes when someone disagrees with us, it’s helpful to realize where we’re alike. Exercises like that condition our mind to start thinking in terms of togetherness rather than division.
3. Being human = having empathy.
You’re human, you have value, and you can change the environment around you, but it starts with caring enough to do so.
The world has seen too many apathetic individuals maintain the status quo long enough for problems to get worse. Understand you exist in the same environment as the people around you. By having empathy for your community and the people within it, you’re allowing yourself to be a part of the solution.
Building the mindset of shared purpose
By all means, we should seek out individuals who have driven positive change and respect their efforts. By celebrating their successes, we push others to achieve their potential. At the same time, it’s important to recognize the community that fostered the growth, the teams that drove action to enable the change, and the environment that was accepting of innovation — they all helped drive meaningful change. It’s like the Dumas quote — “One for all, and all for one.”
We can create an engaging sense of community and involvement, and foster a group tendency to drive change for the greater good. We can pay it forward and empower others to build a mindset of empathy and shared purpose. And in doing so, we become part of that ‘something bigger.’
