The authentic meaning of traveling
I don’t think that there is a right or a wrong way of traveling. Every person has different aims when traveling and is searching for a subjective experience. Some people’s way of traveling doesn’t involve engaging with the locals and are more introspective, experiencing the trip from a spectator view. Others engage with locals if they can communicate with them, asking for tips. Others get quite close with locals and become friends, having access to their private life. I get a mix of all this ways depending on my mindset and phases I go through while traveling.
My way of traveling is no better than any other way. It is just what has been working for me and what I align with. In South East Asia I was being warned a lot about the danger of some countries that were in my list to be visited. Once in Thailand, I was advised by some people to be very careful when going to Vietnam. In Malaysia I was advised to skip my visit to Cambodia as a solo female traveler. I did not listen. I never felt unsafe in any of my destinations. Yes, there were some sketchy situations; I saw some schemes while crossing country’s borders by land and was fooled with fake currency a couple of times. There are honest and dishonest people in every single country. I can say that I felt more afraid and unsafe in my own country than in any other part of the world. When studying in Lisbon, I was chased a couple times and was almost robbed by thieves. Also carrying my laptop on my bag in certain parts of the city made me very nervous.
Before coming to India, where I’m currently traveling, I heard that (similar to what I was told in my trip in SEA) it wasn’t safe to come as a female solo traveler. I was told that many rapes were happening in India, that men stared at women leaving them very uncomfortable, that I would have a culture shock etc. No opinion can replace your own experience. And my experience here so far tells me that I get stared a lot, not only by men but also by women, due to being different. They do look with a curious eye. Our skin tones are different, our features are different and our manners are different too. I call it a wonder stare. And then I open a big smile and they always smile back. Any awkwardness can be dismantled by this action. We are all the same, all human beings and the smile brings us together. It also opens opportunities for conversation, for being asked to take “selfies” or even to be asked for a hug. If it gets overwhelming there’s always a chance to keep walking and not respond.
My way of traveling involves being alert and relaxed at the same time. There’s always some common sense and some skills required to understand when you are possibly in a dangerous/ sketchy situation or if it is your imagination that is making you second-guess every step you take. Common sense tells me not to wander around in the dark peach night, to stay in control (without being a control-freak) and to be aware of the people surrounding me. The exact same as I do in my own country or even in my hometown. By staying in control I mean that I can go to a party from someone I just met, however I’ll be responsible enough to stay sober. I still have loads of fun and will remember those moments forever.
I’m a very relaxed traveler. I don’t recall worrying about anything in my solo trips. Once I was in Kuala Lumpur’s airport about to board to my next destination: Vietnam. The airline staff did not allow me to get in the airplane because apparently I needed a visa requirement (each airline has its specific requirements). I remember that I set down on the floor, took my laptop and started looking into the cheapest flights available. In 20 minutes I had another destination. Instead of Vietnam I went to Langkawi, a beautiful island in Malaysia. Being relaxed allows me to be flexible with dates, events and locations. In this way nothing ruins my plans because I go exactly where I’m supposed to go. It’s like being in permanent adventure where nothing can go wrong. Having too many plans and booked accommodation can limit your experience very quickly. For me, there’s always the opportunity to stay extra days in a place if it seems reasonable or to stay only for a half day in a city which is not exciting me in any way.
What’s more important to me is trying to blend as much as I can in the different cultures. In the first days I observe the locals to see how do they cross the street, how does the public transportation work, how do they eat, learn some basic words, understand their body language etc. Then I copy them and ask for help if there’s something I can’t wrap my head around. I don’t need to do things that I’m not comfortable with or things that I don’t agree with. However being open is crucial.
After a couple weeks I feel integrated. I grab any chance I have to talk to locals about their culture, traditions, habits and way of thinking. Even when is hard to communicate, there’s always something I can take in. Then I gather all of that precious information which gives me a tiny bit of knowledge about the place and its people.
To me, the meaning of traveling is to know other life perspectives and integrate the best parts in my own life. What does traveling mean to you?
