My Eldest Cousin on My Father’s Side Just Passed Away
She was sick but she was still relatively young
I didn’t really get much sleep yesterday before my uncle messaged me on Facebook. I was in the middle of something else so I didn’t immediately answer. The thing is, he doesn’t call often and he only calls me when there’s something important to say.
I knew that I’d need to get back to him as soon as I was up to talking on the phone. I also noticed right after he messaged me a couple of times, he also called my cell phone. He didn’t leave a message. That worried me even more.
If he didn’t leave a message, it had to be something he wanted to say to me directly. It was still pretty early when I went to bed yesterday so it must’ve seemed like I was ignoring him. I just fell asleep very early and couldn’t keep myself awake no matter how hard I tried.
As I woke up this morning, I got a message after a few hours in my Messenger that simply stated, “Gerald, I lost Michelle to cancer.”
Michelle, my cousin, who had been battling cancer for a while now is dead.
It’s only been a few minutes since I’ve read this message to fully process what’s happening. My cousin passed away yesterday. She was only a few years older than I am now. She was 44 years old at the time of her death. Michelle was my uncle’s only daughter after a number of marriages over the years.
They were very close up until her death. I haven’t been in touch with this side of the family as much as I’d like to over the years as this is my father’s side of the family and I’ve had some deep trauma with my dad. Michelle had nothing to do with any of that drama and she seemed like a kind and beautiful soul.
She had battled cancer and I couldn’t even be bothered to check in on her every once in a while. It’s not like my checking on her would’ve aided a recovery anyway but I could’ve at least checked in. I used to keep in regular contact with her when I was on social media. That was the best way for me to keep up with all of my long-distance relatives.
When I decided for months to go off of social media, I must’ve lost track of everyone. How could she have gotten so sick to the point of death while I wasn’t noticing? I don’t really want to focus on the fact that she’s gone. I want to work with my uncle and find a way to celebrate her life.
She is family, after all, and I hope that I can reach out and help my family grieve in any way they need to. I wouldn’t be able to make it down there to attend the service but I’ll find a way to help however I can. Even though we weren’t as close as we could’ve been over the years, I talked to her enough to get to know her to an extent.
Our whole family on that side is pretty much distant from the rest of the family anyway. I’m sure that Michelle’s death could be something that brings us all together now. I do hope that this is an event that would possibly also get my dad to talk to all of us again, not just me, but his grieving brother and his other siblings.
This side of the family is religious and I hope that they can find peace and hold their faith through tragedy. Heaven just got another angel yesterday.
