DEI + EI: Why Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion Would Benefit from Emotional Intelligence
After the suspension of in-person classes following the emergence of the COVID-19 pandemic in the spring of 2020, I was on a Zoom call with other diversity scholars to discuss potential responses to the correlating outbreak of anti-Asian bias. As the discussion progressed, common themes emerged. Many in the group didn’t know where to start on the path of fighting anti-Asian bias. Others weren’t sure how to combat anti-Asian bias in a way that was respectful and wouldn’t perpetuate harm. In that moment, I was forced to question whether the diversity training series we participated in had any material value given the hesitance to apply what we learned through action and advocacy.
The Zoom dialogue that day wasn’t the first time I’ve heard people express fear of incorrectly intervening or questioning how to intervene on issues of bias and oppression. These questions belong in a FAQ for “diversity” training as they are commonly refrained barriers to taking action by diversity-training participants. However, when you look at the throughline you see the concerns share a common theme: navigating emotions. We struggle to know how to motivate ourselves to overcome fear. We don’t trust our capacity to be emotionally resilient after making a mistake. We question how to navigate the uncertainty that is the emotional response of others. While frustrated in the moment of the Zoom call, the experience illuminated that the underdevelopment of emotional intelligence is a consistent barrier to taking action to advance inclusion and justice.
“…the underdevelopment of emotional intelligence is a consistent barrier to taking action to advance inclusion and justice.”
Emotional intelligence — or EI — has gained significant popularity in the last decade, with even corporate recruiters valuing high emotional intelligence over technical training. As such, I think it’s time for diversity and inclusion professionals, and leaders bedeviled by intransigent progress on diversity in their organizations to consider the development of emotional intelligence as a necessary supplement to diversity and inclusion training and initiatives.
Daniel Goleman popularized emotional intelligence in his best-selling book of the same name. In the book he outlines the five components of emotional intelligence. Confident that cultivating emotional intelligence will catalyze action on inclusion, I want to explore how the five elements of emotional intelligence are relevant to dialogue and action on diversity, equity, and inclusion.
1. Self-awareness: Goleman sees self-awareness as being aware of our mood and our thoughts about mood. In the context of inclusion, there are many emotions that the topics of white supremacy, patriarchy, and ableism can elicit: guilt, shame, sadness, anger, powerless, voiceless, numb, vulnerable. When you’re engaging on topics related to diversity and inclusion, how present are you when your emotions are activated? Can you accurately label the emotions? How do you feel about the emotions you identify?
2. Self-regulation: Emotional self-regulation focuses on how we handle our emotions, or our ability to “bounce back” from difficult emotions. When you engage in dialogue or take action on race and racism, does it take all your energy and leave you in your thoughts and feelings for an excessive amount of time afterward? Do you know how to self-soothe and re-achieve emotional balance?
3. Motivating oneself: Emotions are a valuable tool for spurring action. One element of emotional intelligence is your ability to use your emotions to self-motivate, persevere, and potentially delay gratification in pursuit of your goals. When it comes to pursuing justice and equity, I often see fear and anger inhibit a person’s ability to be motivated by justice and what is right. Imagine what it would be like if we could better motivate people to overcome inaction on issues of injustice that are actively harm.
4. Recognizing emotions in others — Our ability to empathize with others is a critical element of emotional intelligence. Given that our racial identity impacts our lived experience, it’s important to understand how our social positionality broadly, and our racial identity specifically, impacts how we respond emotionally and express said emotions. Moreover, we need to be prepared to identify emotions that other people may bring up in us and how we respond to our emotions.
5. Interpersonal Management — Interpersonal management explores our ability to engage andnavigate our emotions, and the emotions of others. In the same way that we can use our emotions in support of our actions, interpersonal management asks that we manage emotions in others in a responsible and non-manipulative manner. In regard to diversity and inclusion, interpersonal management can look like applying a trauma-informed lens when engaging those who have been historically disempowered, recognizing how our social positionality influences how we respond to topics of inequity, and cultivating spaces that are healing and not harmful.
Oftentimes conversations about diversity, equity, and inclusion can focus on the emotional responses of those holding historically empowered identities: white, cisgender male, able-bodied, among others. It’s important to acknowledge that regardless of your social positionality, the emotionally charged topics that fall under the umbrella of diversity, equity, and inclusion often elicit strong emotions in us all — even numbness can be a learned response to discomfort. We likely all have work to do around being more emotionally intelligent in the face of discomfort.
When we collectively develop our emotional intelligence, we will collectively be better able to navigate dialogue and action around diversity, equity, and inclusion. We will be less concerned with getting “diversity” right every time and be better prepared to navigate the emotional exposure that comes with accountability and growth. We will know when we are emotionally prepared to engage in the emotionally charged work of racial justice and how to be emotionally resilient afterward. Most importantly, we will be ready to heal our collective emotional wounds around social injustice.
