Being My Greatest: Taking the Positive Path Instead of the Negative
Wanting to know what “could have” been is such a common desire that we see it as a theme in movies, TV shows, books, and more. If we knew that Choice A would get us the girl, the riches, and happiness, we’d love to be able to peer in into the crystal ball to see that and not pursue Choice B.
Robert Frost captured the idea in his famous poem “The Road Not Taken.” Like many of his poems, it’s very easy to read, but in a way, it’s too easy to read it and think you’ve understood it. his language is simple, but the ideas under it can be very complex. I encountered the poem for the first time when I was in middle school, and it was only after being assigned to write a paper on it that I dissected it enough to note that Frost never said that he made the right choice or that he was happy about his choice; he just says that his choice “has made all the difference.” It could be a bad difference or a good difference, but Frost isn’t clear in a way that I’ve come to realize is very Frost.
The choices we make on a daily basis obviously affect us and where our lives will take us. But, sometimes things just happen to us, too. Regardless of why things may not turn out well, though, there seems to be a reanalysis of what happiness is, what is acceptable at X age in our lives, and more. For example, as I’m going through great life transitions, I’ve set eyes on being happy in 2–5 years in a very different way than I would have a few years ago. What will make me happy and how I can achieve that happiness will be very different, and it requires a different way of thinking and even what I find acceptable in some ways from what I would have thought a few years ago, but we are adaptable creatures. Our choices craft us and our lives. They point us in a direction, and that direction may not be “the best”.
In fact, if we could see all of the possible ways our lives could have taken, our current situation is almost certainly not the most optimal outcome. But, it’s the outcome that we currently know.
And, so, it is the best that we can possibly have because it’s the only one we have. As Sia says in “The Greatest,” “I’m free to be the greatest, I’m alive”. We are free to be our best selves in the here and now because it’s all we have. We can be the best versions of ourselves.
When I wake up on Mother’s Day, a day that my ex-husband is almost certainly going to try to destroy like he did a daycare event this past week relating to it, I have the choice of being my best self, which means being a great mommy to my daughter, focusing on the positive and love in my life, rather than sinking to his level of animosity and negativity. I will be the greatest me. That may not end up being much in the grand scheme of humanity, but it is the best I have to offer myself, my daughter, and the world, and this is the path diverged in a crazy world that I can choose to take.
Children see the way we respond to challenges and how we choose our paths. As much as I want my daughter to be smart, I also want her to be independent and strong. I want her to analyze the choices before her and make the best decision she can with the information before her. So, I must do the same and set a good example that hopefully she will copy. For her, I will be strong as I am attacked. I will survive despite attempts to destroy me.
