Humpty Dumpty – the extended cut

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,

Humpty Dumpty had a big fall.

All the king’s horses and all the King’s men,

Couldn’t put Humpty together again.

They took all the pieces down the hill,

To a man who lived there named Fix-it Bill.

Bill looked at the mess and quite despaired,

He never thought he’d have Humpty repaired.

He put all the pieces up onto his table,

He made a glue out of syrup-of-the-maple,

He stuck Humpty together but could still the cracks,

So he melted a candle and covered him in wax.

He polished him up and he shined him some more,

But Humpty was slippy and fell on the floor.

With a crack and a splat,

Bill knew that was that,

So he decided to have

Scrambled eggs.