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How To Strengthen Friendships at the Moment of Introduction
Establish deeper relationships with this empathetic strategy
A few weeks ago, author Peter Mukherjee wrote a brilliant article on remembering a person’s name if you have forgotten it. Peter is a dear friend, so when he shared this, I immediately thought, “What happens when I introduce someone?”
I am not really that great with names… or faces, for that matter — but if I do remember their names, I have developed an empathetic strategy to build immediate relationships between two people who don’t know each other. This strategy has also strengthened all my friendships.
Not only has it strengthened my personal friendships, but I have numerous examples of those two, whom I have introduced, going on to accomplish great things together. Sometimes, I get left in the dust later, but I rest in knowing that because of my introduction, it helped pave the way for their friendship and future opportunities.
Let me share how we often introduce people.
Suppose you are at a party, and you are talking to someone (whose name you remember), and someone else (whose name you remember) walks up and stands next to you.
Not wanting to be rude, you, of course, make the formal introduction. Let’s say I’m talking to a man named John, and Scott is the new potential participant in the conversation. You might say this:
“Scott, I’d like to introduce you to my friend John.”
That is the most straightforward standard.
If you want a little more connection, you might give their titles:
Scott, I’d like to introduce you to my friend John; he’s my accountant.”
Or you might add a little bit of color to the conversation:
“Hey Scott, I have to introduce you to John. He’s an accountant, and he’s brilliant with numbers.”
These allow the two to meet but rarely lead to relation or connection. All Scott knows about John is his name (essential) and vocation. Both people must then ask more probing questions to establish a relationship. Often, people don’t have the time, especially at a party, so unless something of interest strikes…
