When You Don’t Know What to Do

Sometimes, not doing anything is the answer.

With just two months left in my graduate program (and 3 months on my lease, yikes!), I am facing some really big life decisions. New job, new home, and a new degree. With all of this has come a lot of self-questioning, insecurity, and doubt.

Where am I going to live?
Should I stay in Colorado? If not, where do I go next?!
What kind of job do I want? Will I like it?
Will I have enough money to move?
Is my portfolio good enough? How do I make it better??
I’ve only been doing this for a short time, will I get hired?

I had one wise instructor last semester kindly encourage me to turn down that voice of insecurity (my self-saboteur) in my mind and to believe in my abilities. That advice has helped A TON. Sometimes, I even make the physical motion of turning down a volume dial — just to really let that advice sink in.

This time is different, though. While those thoughts still come up, I don’t listen to them nearly as much as I used to. What gets to me these days is the uncertainty of my future. I am a stereotypical first-born daughter who likes to have a plan and be fully prepared for said plan. For so long, I felt that in order to plan, I needed to have a clear path that I was following. Clear path + preparation = perfect plan. With so much still up in the air for me, I am feeling incredibly unsure.

At times like these, I turn to inspiring role models of mine and let their words of hope wash over me. I speak peace and calm over my soul and choose to find joy in the words of these amazing humans. Here are a few quotes I’ve found helpful lately.

“I’m trusting that it’s ok to just keep doing the next right thing — even when the long-term plan isn’t quite clear. Enough right things will get me where I need to go.” — Brené Brown

When I read this, I find confidence in just taking the next right step. I am preparing by making steady progress on my design portfolio, attending networking events, and practicing the skills I want to be hired for. I don’t have to know which company I’m working for or what city I’ll be living in to do those things. Enough right things will get me where I need to go.

“Take the first step in faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.” — Martin Luther King, Jr.

This is an oldie but goody. Similar to the above quote, not knowing the whole path before me is a convenient excuse to not keep taking steps. I have to keep moving and not let the “not-knowingness” hold me back. I must have FAITH. Faith in my training, in my skills, and in a positive future for myself.

“It starts with finding the direction you want to go in and then figuring out how to build the habits that will get you there.” — Rachel Hollis

Those close to me know that I’ve been drinking all the “Girl, Stop Apologizing” book Kool-aid lately. I just love this woman’s writing and how she is relentless in inspiring others by being a living example. She has another quote about risking and “going all in” that I also heart (but couldn’t remember well enough to share here). What I love about the above quote is that she doesn’t say to find out what you want to do or to figure out the end result. Just find the direction and get the habits in motion that will get you going down that path. With a lot of dishes spinning in the air right now, focusing on a direction instead of anxiously searching for the destination is really freeing for me.

“When it’s time for you to know, God will make it clear. Until then you should just be still.” — My mom ❤

I texted my mom about my life worries earlier this month and this is part of the text she sent me back. I am really grateful to have a spiritually grounded role model for a mother, she keeps me on point! Instead of aimlessly searching, full of fear and uncertainty, her text is a reminder to be at peace with my current situation — trusting that my answer is on its way to me. When I need to know, I’ll know. I think many of us have had experiences when a book we needed to read came into our lives at just the right moment or the job opportunity showed up just in time. For my grad cohort, many of us feel that CMCI Studio appeared to us right when we needed to make a big change in our lives. I love those perfect moments.

I truly believe that these simple sentences hold so much power to change our fears into faith. I am trading my worries in for belief in my best life. I am incredibly excited to see what happens next on this journey of mine. I hope these quotes were inspiring and encouraging to you. Take what resonates and leave the rest.

Here’s to us taking right steps, taking first steps, building good habits, and trusting our future enough to be still in the moment!