MENTALIZATION SKILLS FOR MENTAL HEALTH
When Emotional and Behavioral Contagion Go Wrong
A healthy self-other distinction is critical for an accurate understanding of ourselves and others
Republished from www.centerforappliedtheoryofmind.com
About 15 years ago, while working as a general manager in India, I frequently needed to attend official events sponsored by embassies and international networking organizations. I found myself surrounded by other foreigners like me who came to do business in India from all over the world and from different layers of society. Dealing with people who came from a wide variety of cultures and backgrounds taught me to first take the stance of an observer, watching and listening to people, in order to learn the best way to approach others and initiate a conversation.
Eventually, I started to experiment a little bit with my observations. As I was introduced to a group of foreign businesspeople, I would remark, “I see you have just recently arrived in India, but your colleagues seem to have been here longer.” Most of the time I was spot on, and the people who had just introduced themselves would look at me as if I were clairvoyant. “That’s correct, but how did you know this?” they would ask with surprise. I would…
