Feel Like Doing Nothing, But Here I Am Giving Myself A Challenge
I always wonder why I start something with full force, but somewhere in the middle, things break my consistency, and I get less interested.
Even tho I like to do it, like writing, in that phase I do everything but writing.
I look around, observe every corner of my room, see patterns that I have never seen before, and watch every boring video I have no interest in instead of doing what I like.
Sometimes I get frustrated, looking at myself in the mirror, knowing I have to do something, but I am not, and I don’t know why my brain isn’t “braining”.
I blame my house, my room, my phone, my bed, my chair, my laptop until the only thing left to blame is myself.
I should go out for work, instead of doing it at home. But I am lucky that I can do it at home, with fewer crowds, and fewer people. But I can’t be away from people, it’s good to see something new every day.
Going out is a challenge, especially if you are not good with people, but some challenges are worth adventuring. And If I challenge myself doing a thing, I don’t like, I must challenge myself to do something that I do like and that is WRITING.
I can’t let my brain decide what my mood is, I have to give more powers to my fingers, to type. No matter if it makes sense or not, if people even understand it or hate it. That is not up to me to decide what people like. I type and let people decide for themselves.
It doesn’t matter if no one reads it, I know I write and that is enough for me to keep going. I know myself, and it’s better than others knowing me half.
So As I am typing without any heading, just with instinct, sometimes that’s all that you need.
I challenge myself to write something every day and publish it.
Let’s see how much I can force my brain to be a servant of my fingers and ooze out the unfinished, unpolished, weird, scary, and optimistic thoughts. And bring it out to you, as I said even if you don’t read it, it doesn’t matter. I do my work, and I will be satisfied with it.
