Dealing with a Minor Case of Friend Envy
We don’t need no hateration in this dancery!
Right, I’ll say it- we love our friends but when life is lifting for you, hearing of their latest achievements, especially when you’ve been working so hard for yours, can sting a little.
I’l say it again- we LOVE our friends, when they win, we win but what happens when 2 out of 3 of the group chat are just a stone's throw away from bringing their dreams to reality while you’re still miles in the distance?
Before the news can serve as motivation, the spotlight has a funny way of shifting the focus onto what hasn’t happened for you yet. It can seem like the little green monster is fighting to make an appearance.
If you’ve experienced this at all- congratulations! You are the toxic “frienemy” quoted in all the relevant memes. You are the one that we pray for God to remove from our lives! How dare you have a passing thought, trigging an emotion like this? Shame on you!
Highly unlikely.
The good news is, you’re human and there’s a big difference between having a thought and taking action. That being said, if you’ve already started plotting for the downfall of your goal-scoring mate it’s probably time you left the group chat. You’re not a friend.
If you are a real friend experiencing this conflict of emotion, don’t panic and take a deep breath. The hardest part is over, you’ve recognized the horrible feeling stirring inside of you. It might make you feel a little guilty, but it is a great relief.
You must remember the thing about life, it hits everyone with losses and wins.
You might not personally be in a winning season right now but if you’re putting in the work like your friends are, look at it as your win is around the corner. When you’re frequently witnessing blessings happening around you we like to say:
“God is in the neighborhood”
As I explained, if you’re a real friend the initial news should only sting a little as you reflect on your own affairs.
Communicating and expressing our true feelings with the ones we love is important for the strength of the relationship.
However, this is probably not the best time to confess that you’re struggling to celebrate because of the appearance of the little green monster.
Hold that urge to be completely honest this time, cry when you get home, scream into a pillow if you really need to, and talk to someone else about it for now.
As much as we love a selfish era, there’s is a time and a place for everything and it’s time to be a good friend. Celebrate and enjoy the moment with them. We don’t need your tears raining on anyone’s parade today.
