When You Can No Longer Escape
Emotional Maturity Will Cease The Chaos
In my endless mission to seek the clear meaning around things that surround me in my life, I am swiftly shown a reality about some tough personal things. I also learn that my worst enemy is often me, and my biggest trigger is almost always me. Many of my journeys that turned to a dark reality, were strongly driven by me. I had been going down the wrong path, seeking meaning and resolve from the wrong places. I wanted to share some words about the many times, I have allowed my negative self talk to totally take over any direction I was heading.
Though I am still here now, in tact, and in decent health, it was not a healthy trip I took, one that took me the ultra long way. Giving away my heart and my time, to causes that I would never be able to get back.
Once there was much need to escape in my life. Even if warranted, it still remained painful, since I was never taught on how to escape from our own worst thoughts inside. When it’s your mind that you do battle with, the outcome turns out painful and chaotic.
What do we do, when we need an escape, but our only learned skill, is the self taught damaging acts of addictions? Our acts of abusing substances, or erratic behaviours, do nothing to defeat the very wrong that we desire to escape. After much of that pain that was hidden, did its own escaping back out into the open, I knew then, that I finally had to find a different way.
I knew that I could no longer make choices, like travelling the same roads to dead ends. I learned a wise lesson, when I was already deep into hell. But it wasn’t a lesson learned too late.
We often fail to realize that growth, can offer so much. Growth, can initiate starting points, and when it’s our emotions that experience growth, it is then our needs or desires to escape can diminish. As we grow inside, emotionally, we see the dark, true results, that can come in due time because of escape.
Emotional maturity, can aid us in avoiding those grasps of escape, and it can also be our true escape, from our escape. Sounds funny, but it’s quite serious. The pain we are hiding from, becomes a direct connection. The growth we seek, can be the true healing of our pain, and a route that doesn’t indulge in chaos.
With growth, we will see risk. We will see unknown, and we will even see plenty of defeat. What we will not see is an unhealthy type of escape, when we seek to hide from the barriers we hit. We learn through growth, and we learn when faced with the unknown. From that unknown can come solutions and answers. From those defeats, will come knowledge, that we are lights years from perfection. But we are close as ever to human. Defeat will strengthen us, and defeat will wipe out any feeling of being better than all.
I spent what seems like a lifetime, attempting to escape from the pain, the difficult lessons, the truth that I refused to hear and refused to know.
Growth forced a patience upon me. An acceptance that with no patience, comes no movement forward. Without patience, will come a dead end as we seek maturity.
Emotional maturity, will help us understand, all those things we once feared and tried escaping from. No longer having that fear, will allow us a clearer vision, of things that we now know, we can handle. Things that we will gain victories over, and defeats as well.
Eliminating that instinct to run, and escape will lead to a better chance of not being held down. Accept that growth, as a chance to clean up the chaos, that once was a vice we couldn’t break from.